Press Release: Vendio Wins 2010 eBay Star Developer Awards

Vendio Rapidly Evolves to Claim First Winner Prize
at 2010 eBay Star Developer Awards

Employees Found Designing Intelligently

Sans Loser, California.   June 16, 2010 — Vendio Services, Inc. today stood a little more upright and taller while being named the winner in the Rapid Evolution category at eBay’s Developer Conference. In an ironic twist, Vendio sent two of their shorter representatives to claim the physical prize while the tallest of the group met additional obligations to extend the selection bias to the next generation.

Some on the ever humble team credited the repeated Stuart Smalley affirmations that were instituted before each meeting after last year’s First Loser showing. Most, however, noted the sharp turnaround in fearful productivity when Producer Les Grossman came on board to literally, “&^%* our #^%$ up and turn us all into Playas.”

Other team members noted that winning in the “Rapid Evolution” category perhaps provided not the highest bar since most developers are men and therefore generally not evolved at all. CTO Greg McNutt was heard saying, “Hunting for bugs in the middle of the night don’t exactly scream ‘evolution.’” Two potential recruits from Geico, however, still cancelled their Vendio job interviews upon hearing the news.

Back at the office on Monday, the team was led in a “We’re Number One” chant with fingers held high. A couple of the teammates actually used their index fingers during this chant, with most others following the executive guidance to “show me the finger” a bit more creatively. One crafty employee had even purchased a San Francisco Giants foam finger, scissors, and a glue gun, “just in case the opportunity ever arose.”

Speaking of crafty, the eBay developer program went all out and provided Vendio an amazing hand-crafted Garfield Chia pet trophy. He’ll serve as a constant reminder that, “The meek shall inherit squat.” Also, that we’re all really, really hungry and hate Mondays.  Upon seeing a cat that looks like a bush, both Chief Morale Officers Angelus and Storm circled for minutes trying to figure out the proper order of chase, eat, and pee. Most succinctly, Angelus stated simply, “Arrroooooooo!”

Finally, in honor of the World Cup, it was naturally one of the European team members who noted that Mia Hamm once said, “There are always new, grander challenges to confront; and a true winner will embrace each one.” The women immediately understood the significance. The male team members, upon realizing Mia is a chick and therefore probably more evolved, similarly took it upon themselves to strive ever further for each goal in the year ahead.

About Vendio

Founded in 1999, Vendio Services, Inc. helps small – to medium-sized merchants (SMM’s) manage their sales seamlessly across online sales channels including their own branded Vendio storefront, Amazon.com, eBay, Google, Shopzilla, and more. Over 80,000 merchants use Vendio’s award winning multi-channel Platform, Store, and Applications to sell nearly $2 billion in merchandise. The company also operates Dealio, a shopping and online coupons site for consumers. Vendio is a venture backed, privately-held company headquartered in San Mateo, California with an office in Bucharest Romania.

By Mike Effle, Vendio Chief Operating Officer (and apparently, a pretty funny guy)

One Response to “Press Release: Vendio Wins 2010 eBay Star Developer Awards”

  1. Tweets that mention Vendable » Blog Archive » Press Release: Vendio Wins 2010 eBay Star Developer Awards -- Topsy.com Says:

    [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by vendio, Vendio_Crystal. Vendio_Crystal said: RT @vendio: Vendio "Press Release" – Funny AND Entertaining (we promise) – http://budurl.com/kna6 (Plz RT) [...]

Leave a Reply