spazmodeus
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posted on October 7, 2000 02:20:21 PM
The online auction industry (at least that portion of it here on the message boards) is so rife with plot twists, cliffhangers, nasty disputes, backstabbing and larger-than-life characters that it's only a matter of time until someone in Hollywood options us for a movie -- or at least a Darren Star TV series.
To make the casting director's job easier when the time comes, I invite everyone to choose an actor they think would do a good job portraying them. ( For example, my people are going to be contacting Christopher Walken's people to see if he's interested in playing the part of spazmodeus. )
So go ahead, choose to your heart's delight. Nothing's on paper yet, so your choices are wide open. If you really want to be daring, feel free to suggest alternates for other posters -- for example, if you think my people ought to be talking to Gilbert Gottfried instead.
Just remember, play nice. It's all in fun.
[ edited by spazmodeus on Oct 7, 2000 02:22 PM ]
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rawbunzel
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posted on October 7, 2000 02:33:11 PM
I want Janeane Garofalo to play me. [wanted to be first because I know she'll be popular!]
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siggy
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posted on October 7, 2000 02:42:47 PM
Christopher Walken? ooh, spooky, Spaz.
Hadn't thought about it. Chirstopher Guest for director, though. He has a well honed sense of the absurd.
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Meya
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posted on October 7, 2000 02:48:56 PM
I would like Francis McDormand to play me. Not a great beauty by today's 90 pound blond standard, but real. "Yah, you betcha"
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spazmodeus
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posted on October 7, 2000 02:51:40 PM
LOL, siggy, the way things have been going I would have said Irwin Allen.
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Shadowcat
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posted on October 7, 2000 02:57:20 PM
I'd probably be "Poster #5" and played by a waitress/aspiring actress whose name scrolls by on the credits so fast that her family doesn't believe she was actually in the movie.
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bitsandbobs
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:17:46 PM
Mine would only be a "bit" part so anyone could do it. But for box-office appeal I'll settle for being portrayed by Sean Connery!

Bob, Downunder but never down.
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hellcat
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:18:34 PM
Holly Hunter, of course!
S-Kitty, I was already picturing Mary Steenburgen in your role.
But I simply can't come up with the right actor to play that madcap, gif-loving, chatterbox, KRS...
Beth
[email protected]
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Shadowcat
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:20:16 PM
Oh, well, if we can have walk on cameos, I'll go for Michelle Pfeiffer in her Catwoman costume.
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oddish4
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:20:55 PM
I would like Sandra Bullock. How true to life does this have to be?
Or maybe the Mom from Malcolm in the Middle? That's more like it. hehe
Oddish~ The Odd One
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Shadowcat
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:23:35 PM
H-kitty: As long as Mary would wear the catsuit...
How about Robin Williams for KRS? Or Kevin Spacey-his deadpan delivery of cutting lines is hilarious.
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krs
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:27:54 PM
Robin Williams won't work. I went to school with him. Try Sissy Spacek.
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plsmith
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:29:26 PM
Ha! Holly Hunter is PERFECT for you, Beth
Roseanne for me.
John Waters for Krs. (He could also direct.)
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Shadowcat
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:34:00 PM
Then how about Rowan Atkinson, without the British accent?
Foppie: Which Roseanne era would you be? Early standup, the Tom days, post-Tom, that sort of thing.
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siggy
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:35:26 PM
I love Malcolm in the Middle! That show's a real hoot.
Oh yeah, this could be in the genre of "The Usual Suspects." And just when you think you know what happened, you find out you don't.
No Sissy for you Krs, I figure you for a more Norma Rae kind of guy....just kidding. How about Malcolm McDowell?
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siggy
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:37:00 PM
Foppie, Domestic Goddess? Hhmnn...
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plsmith
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:40:58 PM
The early Tom period, I think, S-Kitty.
Heh, siggy, all it takes is a bowl of Cheetos...
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mauimoods
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:48:10 PM
Nobody can play me except the divine Bette Midler
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pattaylor
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posted on October 7, 2000 03:51:10 PM
Rodney Dangerfield.
[email protected]
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snowyegret
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posted on October 7, 2000 04:03:55 PM
"I'll get serious about housework when they invent a riding vacumn cleaner"
early Roseanne
The inimitable Billy Connolly would play me.
pattaylor: LOL! No respect?
[ edited by snowyegret on Oct 7, 2000 04:09 PM ]
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siggy
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posted on October 7, 2000 04:07:40 PM
Good one, Pat T. 
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jeanyu
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posted on October 7, 2000 04:14:20 PM
Jane Fonda, of course 
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Shadowcat
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posted on October 7, 2000 04:26:03 PM
Start practicing Dangerfield's famous line, Pattaylor. Ya gotta be able to say it with just the right amount of long suffering in your voice.
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maddienicks
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posted on October 7, 2000 04:40:54 PM
I want Rosie O'Donnell since Fop already got Roseanne, damn it.
And I need some paper towels, too, because pattaylor made me spit all over my screen. I get scared when I see a moderator with a sense of humor over here.
Kris
[email protected]
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herself
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posted on October 7, 2000 04:55:07 PM
No, no. Sissy Spacek should play me. Everybody says so...
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DoctorBeetle
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posted on October 7, 2000 05:31:01 PM
I would pick Groucho Marx for my role. Since he has been dead for so long he should be able to do an incredibly realitic portrayal of my lack of participation in any of the events spaz outlined in his original post.
Dr. Beetle
He would probably work cheap too.
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junquemama
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posted on October 7, 2000 05:40:55 PM
Carol Burnett,Or Tracy Allman,I can get cockney.Love their little people.
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Shadowcat
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posted on October 7, 2000 05:44:01 PM
I can't imagine this movie having a lot of action. It would just be a bunch of people sitting in front of their computers, busily typing away. I suppose every now and then someone could yell at their monitor or something, just to liven things up on the screen.
Definitely one of those artsy-fartsy movies.
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barrybarris
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posted on October 7, 2000 05:52:20 PM
Don Rickles
Barry (you hockey puck) Barris
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toomanycomics
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posted on October 7, 2000 06:13:33 PM
Kevin Smith with no beard and certain enhancements
a documentory movie
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