posted on August 30, 2005 07:42:17 PM new
I have a Birthday story to tell....The CITY of Los Angeles gave me one Whopping Birthday present....
Here goes my Rambling story,,,,I will TRY to down size as MUCH as possible,,,,lots of read between the lines,,,,( why oh why do I go off on these tangents?) hahahahaha....because they are real time life...
A guy approached me the other day,,,Hey Jack,,,(I bet this takes 10 mins to write this) I am selling trinkets and such at a MAJOR Show/event in Los Angeles. He has been asked/told to leave several times,,,by City officials,,No license,,,,( but many others are doing the SAME thing???) THEY have No lic. Because there IS NO license to do this. (so the City says). I LOVE a Challenge! I LOVE going through the HOOPS of City ordances,,,
Be here 9 a.m. let's take a drive to L.A...We get there,,,,,The BIG Building,,,the one on the BADGE of the L.A.P.D.....in we go after a strip search, hahahaha, metal detectors,,,,
I would like to apply for a STREET vendors lic. Sir there are NO street vendors lic. isssued in this city,,,BUT, but what about all the peanut sellers and banana sellers in the MIDDLE of EVERY interestction? they are ALL illegal sir,,,,,(they are? And those same people are there year after year after ???),,,,Hmmmmm,,,,,weird,,,,
I am a Veteran,,,,,that's nice she says,,,But We only issue to SPECIAL Circumstance Veterans,,,I start whipping out the papers,,,ID Cards,,,,Vet Card,,,Retired, card,,,DD214,,,,,,Sir!!!!!! you are piling your PAPERS on another persons FILE,,,,,( there was NOBODY ELSE IN THE ENTIRE Office!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) ME and MY partner!! 10 a.m. hahahaha,,,,,,,,,,
They did NOT even GLANCE at what I had presented,,,,,,THEY presented ME with more of THEIR papers.........
You need to have verified papers from a Doctor,,,,,,,WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ????? military paper out the ying yang and THEY want A Doctors sig......Insane!!!!!! AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the Los Angeles V.A. Hosp. is 15 miles away.....let's go! out the door,,,poof........
We get to the V.A.......more insanity! 2 months,,,,,,WHAT!!!!!!!!!!! I hit EVERY office in the place,,,,,Need a Sig from Doc....sorry,,,,,Nope, can't help....go to 1045,,,,,,nope,,,,,,MORE BS.......finally,,,,,,VFW liason.....he says,,,,, go to 11000 wilshire Blvd.....hahahah,, He, himself a Former Marine says,,,,,,you were a Marine, you know the system,,,,this is a HOSP......the Record are in Admin. 1 mile away,,,,,,Aye Aye SIR!!!!! We hot foot it over there,,,,,,UP the elevator MORE security checks,,,,,
GOT the papers!!!!!!!!! yippie!!!!!!
15 miles BACK to CITY Hall,,,,,,,bumper to bumper traffic, HOT,,,,,,,unreal!!!!!!
This time Security KNOWS my face,,,,,hahahaha,,,,,just go on in,,,,hahaha,,,, no sig required,,,,,
The VERY nice NEW face Lady says, do you have the passport type photos? WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!! not MORE!!!!!! Where? she yells hey dan where, I Yell out, HEY what about the people selling those FAKE Green Card ID's!!!!!!! hahaha, she smiles a REALLY big smile and says NO!!!!! hahahaha......Dan says there is a photo guy right outside in a small shop,,,,We get the photos,,,,,,I look like AMERICAS MOST Wanted!!!!!hahahahah,,,,,,,,
We go BACK,,,,,,,,,,,,,She give me a flimsy little reciept that she Stapled my picture on,,,,,here you go,,,,,WHAT!!!!!?????? nothing FANCY,,,,Nope,,,,,yuor not going to send me anything in the Mail? Nope, we don't even care if you have an address,,,,hahahaha
Bottom line,,,,,,,,,,I,,,,,,,,have the ONLY legal license in the ENTIRE City of Los Angeles to Legally SELL Peanuts on ANY friggin street Corner, hahahaa or Anything ELSE.....hahahaha, What a frigging day......
From the City of Los Angeles,,,,,Happy Birthday Jack...
Hahahaha, A nice back up if e bay sales falter,,,,,,,,,,Thanks All,,,,,,,,,,God Bless the American Vets........Salute!!!!
posted on August 30, 2005 08:08:03 PM new
So your next step is to find a reliable source for peanuts. Then call the cops and VERO all the other vendors. Then get out on the corner and enjoy and profit from your monopoly. Next time, just do like they do in Chicago. Just slip the clerk $50.00 under the counter, grab the license that will suddenly appear and run like hell
A $75.00 solid state device will always blow first to protect a 25 cent fuse ~ Murphy's Law
