posted on October 6, 2007 02:00:01 PM
A buyer did a Buy It Now on one of my auctions. When I noticed it after a few hours I sent an invoice. Then I saw an email she sent that was rude. I asked her why she was so rude to me when I had reduced the price by $15 so she could buy it. She got even more rude. I refunded her money and told her why. Then she got weird on me and is trying to force me to sell it to her. She has sent the payment to me several times and then has started bidding on other of my auctions. I canceled her bids and put in a bidder block. She seems to think I am obligated to still sell it to her. I think she is a nut case. I am to the point that I wish she would just neg me and move on. Am I obligated to complete the transaction when I think she is going to be a nightmare?
I just checked and she has negged me but she is now going through Ebay to force me to complete the transaction. At this point it would take a gun to make me send it to her.
[ edited by kasue on Oct 6, 2007 02:02 PM ]
posted on October 6, 2007 02:31:48 PM
I would forward copies of her e-mails to EBay to explain why as a Seller you choose not to deal with an irrational person.
If you have already refunded her money that should be the end of it.
posted on October 6, 2007 09:11:08 PM
I am not overly concerned about the negative. My feedback is pretty good. How do I stop her from PayPaling me? I return it, she sends it. I return it, she resends it. Each time saying something along the line of Ebay will make me complete the transaction. Not after all this garbage. This has gone on all day. Is there a way to block her payment?
posted on October 6, 2007 11:31:36 PM
I've never noticed that "rudeness" is one of eBay's acceptable reasons for cancelling a sale. She bid, she paid, eBay expects you to complete the transaction, rudeness and potential nightmares notwithstanding.
posted on October 7, 2007 06:47:14 AM
I tend to agree with Karen. Although I understand the stress associated with rudeness over the internet, when you can't accurately gauge the person's tone or attitude, you have already experienced the worst things that can happen, negative feedback, harassing emails,etc. Why not just complete the transaction and be done with it?
[ edited by merrie on Oct 7, 2007 06:48 AM ]
posted on October 7, 2007 08:50:25 AM
You just answered your own question, merrie, "negative feedback, harassing emails,etc". I sure don't plan on rewarding her for the way she has gone about things by sending her the ring now.
My question is: Doesn't Ebay have a policy that the seller doesn't have to complete the transaction under certain circumstances? I believe if they don't now, they used to. I've been selling on Ebay since 1999 and have only run into one crazy before.
posted on October 7, 2007 08:50:57 AM
I wouldn't send it. She does sound like a nut case. If she is, you'll be facing a paypal complaint, it wasn't as described, the box was empty, etc. You'll be out the item and dealing with a paypal problem.
As for ebay forcing you to complete the transaction, what happens if the item is damaged prior to mailing it?
[ edited by London4 on Oct 7, 2007 08:53 AM ]
posted on October 7, 2007 08:54:39 AM
London4, I think she is just that nuts, too. I don't need a Paypal nightmare on top of the current one. I need to know what I can do to protect myself against this woman.
posted on October 7, 2007 08:57:46 AM
Do you plan to get your FVF back from Ebay?
If so,what reason would you give?
I would ship the item and move on .
If you relist,she can bid again under a different ID.
*
Lets all stop whining !
*
[ edited by hwahwa on Oct 7, 2007 09:00 AM ]
posted on October 7, 2007 11:43:50 AM
Yes, eBay has several conditions under which a sale may not be completed, but "she sent me a rude e-mail and I think she'll be a nightmare to deal with" isn't among them. Unless her "rudeness" included threats, eBay AND Paypal are going to expect you to complete the transaction. Sure, you can keep refunding her payments and she's already negged you, and if you do send her the ring she'll probably open a not-received or not-as-described dispute thus becoming the nightmare you predicted---and brought upon yourself.
posted on October 7, 2007 12:13:14 PM
Nice, KarenMx. Never had to deal with a psycho, I take it.
Or maybe you just roll over and give every complainer exactly what they want.
If I have a brick and mortar jewelry store, someone comes in and asks to purchase an item then gets abusive when I present a request for payment, I tell them to leave.
Too many people use the anonymity of the Web to act out their aggressions.
fLufF
--
Jody Coyote crept in on little cat feet at clearanceclarence.com
posted on October 7, 2007 12:23:00 PM
You've already received a neg. A ring is a small item, tell her the stone is loose, it has a scratch, your auction description is wrong, it's not the size you listed, whatever.
She sounds as though she'll complain to ebay either way. Better to have a complaint that you didn't mail because the item was defective than to have one that you mailed an empty box.
If this is the first or even second time in 7 or 8 years of selling that ebay's received a complaint, my money is 100% behind ebay will do nothing.
posted on October 7, 2007 12:28:23 PM
I know it's too late for this advice, but maybe next time.
When I have a problem buyer, I don't react. I'll follow thru with the sale like I normally do. Once they post feedback it's my turn.
posted on October 7, 2007 12:55:13 PM
I think that the fact that this buyer started bidding on kasue's other items indicates that her bad feelings were justified.
I also think that eBay will back you up once presented with that evidence - that crosses the line between "rude" and "nut case".
-------------------------------------
posted on October 7, 2007 01:08:33 PM
I get the impression that the buyer started bidding on the other items after she was inadvertantly antagonized by kasue's questioning her rudeness.
posted on October 7, 2007 01:41:39 PM
Actually I do have a brick and mortar antique store. I haven't had a customer get in my face for years. But if the same circumstances presented itself in the store, I would say "no sale". Fluffy, I will be emailing you.
posted on October 7, 2007 06:28:29 PM
Actually, I deal with "psychos" (both exceptionally rude people and bona fide mental patients) every day in my "real job", and no, I don't give in to complainers.
What I don't do is say "you were rude to me, so I don't have to deal with you.", knowing that to do so will only serve to provoke the crazy one into further rude/weird/annoying behavior.
I'd have ignored the rude e-mail, blocked her as a bidder, sent the item, and been done with it. Dwelling on someone's rudeness just wastes too much time and energy.
posted on October 7, 2007 07:20:50 PM
harassment is an acceptable reason to not complete a transaction ~ it is on the pull down list to be reported through safe harbor.
If this eBaYer has a history, she will be naru'ed.
If no history (or, most likely in this case, no REPORTED history of abuse / harassment)
she will get a warning.
I've had my share of crazies.........
posted on October 8, 2007 05:45:11 PM
I have had these problems, just do not respond to this nut.. She will go away in time. You do not need these kind of people in you life. And as far Ebays Feedback system goes, no body cares.
posted on October 9, 2007 09:03:56 AMAnd as far Ebays Feedback system goes, no body cares.
While that is true insofar as few people actually seem to read feedback, feedback does matter now in the year 2007. It's important that sellers understand the evolution of feedback from a collection of informal comments to a set-in-stone eBay standard.
From the beginning, the feedback system has been unfair to sellers because any comment can be left as long as it passes eBay's obscenity filters.
But now feedback, along with several other dubious metrics, is used to determine eBay's lowest-performing sellers. Those sellers are harshly punished by having their auctions restricted, causing undue and unforeseen financial hardship. In some cases they are NARU'd, stripped of their livelihood. I'm sure we'd all like to see the bad apples go away, but eBay's ham-fisted enforcement of this new 20% initiative also harms those who've done nothing wrong.
And it's the feedback system that enables this. It's wrong.
posted on October 9, 2007 10:18:46 AM
What great common sense, practical, no stress advice:
""".... nightmare you predicted---and brought upon yourself.""
""I'd have ignored the rude e-mail, blocked her as a bidder, sent the item, and been done with it. Dwelling on someone's rudeness just wastes too much time and energy."""
Since when will "punishing" someone for being rude solve anything....rude people's money is still green and ya can't change the world.
posted on October 9, 2007 04:34:52 PM
You might not be able to change the world, but I bet I she'll change how she talks to people on Ebay for no reason at all. Yes, I have made Ebay a better place. No thanks necessary!
posted on October 9, 2007 06:26:10 PMYou might not be able to change the world, but I bet I she'll change how she talks to people on Ebay for no reason at all. Yes, I have made Ebay a better place. No thanks necessary!
About eight years ago I was going through a very rough time with my eBay business. It was like the song: Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, here I am, stuck in the middle.
Expenses were sky high -- listing fees were much higher than now -- and sellthrough was poor. Worse, some of my customers were people who just wanted to cause trouble. I would think I'd gotten rid of them, then they'd pop back up under a different ID. I felt helpless and depressed.
Then I read something on Vendio, posted by someone gone from here long ago:
"Don't let them steal your power."
It wasn't even referring to me or my situation, but instantly I knew what was wrong and how to fix it.
Kudos to kasue for not letting the bozo steal her power!
fLufF
--
P.S. Print this out and tape it up somewhere handy for when you need it:
"No one has a right to steal your power. No one. I don't care if it's your mother, father, son, daughter or close friend. (Or customer! --fLufF) There is never a reason why anyone should have your permission to put you down, disrespect you, steal your energy, or rob you of precious self-esteem."
posted on October 10, 2007 12:08:00 PM
Rarely does hawawa (aka stopwhining) have good advice. Sure, at first you should have ignored the e-mail and simply completed the transaction.
But it's too late for that now. Don't send the item. If she continues to pay, don't refund. Let PayPal take the money back.
If you send the item now, you can bet the farm that she will do a charge back.
As far as eBay goes, screw eBay! It's your money and/or property as stake here. Not theirs. Cover your azz first. Don't worry about ebay. If you have been clean in the past, one little mark won't matter.
As far as FVF's go, that's your coin flip. Personally, I wouldn't bother as you do have to share some of the blame.
posted on October 12, 2007 05:41:23 AM
""""No one has a right to steal your power. No one. I don't care if it's your mother, father, son, daughter or close friend. (Or customer! --fLufF) There is never a reason why anyone should have your permission to put you down, disrespect you, steal your energy, or rob you of precious self-esteem.""""
All that can happen with a rude email!!!!????
EEEK! I didn't know that !
I just took their money and forgot all about them.....guess for some it's personal and not just a business..... sorry!
"childrens do learn"