posted on April 11, 2001 11:08:49 PM new
I liked it! My only criticisms: watch those run-on sentences; you could also tighten up the story a bit by going through it & deleting superfluous bits (for instance, in the second part, the line about the husband putting his legs under the table detracts--there would actually be more humor without it).
My only criticisms: watch those run-on sentences; you could also tighten up the story a bit by going through it & deleting superfluous bits (for instance, in the second part, the line about the husband putting his legs under the table detracts--there would actually be more humor without it).