posted on June 19, 2001 08:47:50 PM new
Dear Dubya,
Your Euro-Victory-Tour was such an overwhelming success! Those Europeans were ecstatic when they heard your preaching. Soon, Europe will become part of the worldwide Good News Club of Compassionate Conservatism! Pat Robertson said that he viewed the "Europeans like a sclerotic bunch, a bit out of it". But your "Rule or Ruin Sermon" re-awakened Europe!
First, you visited the Spanish King and his wife in Madrid (in Spain, not in Iowa, but a nice town anyway). That Spanish King looked really Conservative, but a bit sclerotic.
You renamed the Spanish President of the Government to Presidente Anzar (President Hook). That was on purpose, right? Sure, under the leadership of President Hook Spain will be a much better business partner! Did your heart beat faster when you visited the Quintos de Mora Wildlife Refuge 160 miles south of Madrid? Thanks to the Spanish Government 900 hectares of forest and shrubs (!) are conserved for oil and gas drilling. Next time you should take Dick Cheney with you; he will hardly be able to contain himself in view of all these bountiful opportunities. I hope you didn't try to do the "windmill thing" with the blades of your helicopter? According to Miguel de Cervantes only trained personnel, like Don Quixote and Sancha Panza, can successfully battle the windmills. We Compassionate Conservatives prefer Faith-Guided Missiles!!
That speech by the NATO Secretary General Mr. Robertson sounded a bit funny, but sure you understood his Belgian well enough. We are confident, that the NATO countries can't
wait to get covered by your Faith-Guided-Missiles. In that old Swedish town Gothenburg, you preached the blessing of Global Temperature Enhancement. That sure has heated up those Swedes! Thanks to your Faith-Guided-Missile Initiative the governments of Russia and China are now engaging in the most friendly talks since a long time. They were never that close after Mao Zedong died. You are such a uniter! They really got that message from you: "the old days when we could blow each other up, are over!" To respond to your Faith-Guided-Missile Defense System they will now make more missiles than ever before. The future will bring such a magnificent arms race, more exciting than any stock-car race!!
The Bush-iosi of the arms industry are ready: they can't wait to get those multi-billion-dollar checks from your Government! U.S. Congress, don't stand in the doorway, don't block up the hall, for the wars are changing!!
Did you see how much Europeans pay for gas at the pump? Those Euro prices are beyond the wildest dreams of the Bush-iosi! Frankly, they were getting sick of all that whining about gas prices. So, the Bush-iosi of the oil industry were inspired by their European friends and started a complicated process to improve American gas prices. In 1995 Chevron started to curtail refinery output in order to boost its profits. In 1996 Texaco, in a highly confidential scheme, joined Chevron's efforts. In that same year Exxon worked hard to force small independent refineries out of business. Now only five companies: Exxon-Mobil, Chevron-Texaco, BP-Amoco-Arco, Philips-Tosco and Marathon control 40% of domestic gas production, and more than 60% of the domestic retail market. That way, they were able exert market power. Just like the Energy Bush-iosi handled the power market in California, the gas Bush-iosi managed to establish synchronized gas price hikes in the Midwest. Such a magnificent proof of the power of the free market! Think how well the gas dollars of the consumers support the Bush-iosi. Gas dollars to help those most in need!! Such an inspiring new slogan for Compassionate Conservatism, right?
Here on the home front, we continued the Education War. We are still in the trenches against public education in America. We continue fighting for your school voucher plan, even if the majority of Americans keeps voting against it. As Doug Robertson put it: it is a no-brainer, give parents the right to pull their kids out of public schools. Thanks to you school voucher plan, we can make sure that all kids will have to go to Christian schools. And if public education doesn't collapse fast enough? We now have the Senate- approved sledgehammer of Annual Testing. That will teach those public schools to Teach To The Test!! Failing public schools will lose their funding. "You are the President: you have the power to withhold or to give money", remember? As Pat Robertson put it: (we, compassionate conservatives) ". want to reform those kids. The left has this pathological fear for our bringing of God back into the schools". We don't want just Sundays. Every day in school shall be a day of unlimited proselytizing!! On June 11 the Supremes handed Compassionate Conservatism such a magnificent victory. The judicial storm-troopers of Jay Sekulow's American Center for Law and Justice got access to all the schools of Milford, New York for the Good News Club. This decision will nail the coffin of public education shut. From now on, all schools will be centers for straight proselytizing. Sam Brownback of Kansas was ecstatic, and now works hard to make sure that Religion will be front and center in all of public life in America.
Senator Rick Santorum of Kansas wrote a bill to introduce "Sound Science" in all American schools. From now on, our kids don't have to read about evolution; thanks to "Sound Science" they will learn about "Intelligent Design". The Bible will replace history textbooks. That is a win-win scheme. The kids got an easy no-brainer, and you will save a lot of money from the education bill. Because you need hundreds of billions for your Faith-Guided-Missiles, you asked for only $24 billion for your first priority. U.S.Congress gave you $33 billion. So, the girls of the Christian Coalition will keep working hard to save $9 billion of the education money for more missiles and for the next Tax Cut!! We continue to pray for your judicial appointments. As Pat Robertson has put it: "Bush people say: No more Souter; He is worse than Ruth Bader-Ginsburg. He is a Liberal (yikes!!)!! Time will come for Bush to stop playing nice. The president needs to stand by his principles: force a fight!" Only die-hard conservative justices that pass all our litmus' tests will be allowed on the bench. Our justices will be reliable, unrelenting operatives on the battlefield of our courts. We will keep America, by redefining justice on our terms!!
Can you believe it? The Dems just took over the Senate and now they are going to investigate Carl Rove, your Senior Adviser and Chief of Strategery. Up to June 7, Carl owned stock in Intel Corp. and Cisco Systems. That put him in an excellent position to deal with the American high tech industry. Such a nice confluency of Government and Industry interests, right? But, we have to stay vigilant. On June 13 it was 30 years ago that the Washington Post conspired with the Dems in that Watergate story, remember? We can't have a White House Gate story now. Make sure you keep the Gates shut!!
I hope you didn't take any of Vladimir Putin's funny bottles with "small water" home? Your little Grand Old Party Animals can't wait to taste some real Gorbatchev, but Laura doesn't approve of that. She has already a hard time to save the Jack Daniels for you.
My motto for the week to come: Welcome back to the Land of Rule and Ruin.
God Bless 'Merica!
Your Nancy
(Nancy remains anonymous)
[ edited by krs on Jun 19, 2001 08:54 PM ]
posted on June 19, 2001 09:12:14 PM new
No, Nancy writes these periodically and sends them to politex. Jerry Politex evidently doesn't know who she is either.
posted on June 19, 2001 10:08:35 PM new
KRS, thanks for posting them up for us all the time. I get a real chuickle out of some of them. As things become more grim on both the national and international scene, I am finding it a bit hard to laugh at the right places. It has been several centries since this land had a new form of government and it is dizzing to try to keep up with it. Most dissappinting is how Bush supporters keep the faith with him, while they ignore the whirlwind of changes being made on every frontier of government -- some giving outright support of Fascism and agreeing with the whole thing. How can be be so naieve and so stupid?
posted on June 20, 2001 07:11:19 AM new"We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease."--After meeting with the leaders of the European Union, Gothenburg, Sweden, June 14, 2001
posted on June 20, 2001 08:30:30 AM new
An additional rant by 'dian':
Dear Politex...
The spin doctors of the illegal resident in the White House are now whining about "partisan politics." It's "unfair" to point out that the whole thief family squatting in the White House are liars and drunks who all have police records. It's "not an issue" that dumbya can't pronounce three words in a row. It's "the president's right" to fill his cabinet and the courts with nazis, bigots, and crooks, even though he not only does NOT have a mandate, but DID NOT WIN the election, and IS NOT the legal president. The illiterate hand-puppet's hard-drinking ...law-breaking daughters are "off limits" and "a personal family matter." This from the same people who insulted Chelsea Clinton's haircut and questioned her parentage. Laura Bush's [accidental killing] of her boyfriend and the napping nose-picker's...wartime desertion -- which he blatantly lied about in his own book -- are "ancient history" and "youthful indiscretions." But eight years of hysterical screeching by the bought -and-paid-for right-wingnuts and their stupidest sheep about "dope smoking" was "all about character!" Winning a Rhodes scholarship was "draft dodging," whine the moronic supporters of two draft dodgers. Al Gore's Viet Nam tour "didn't really count because he didn't actually kill anyone," sneer the right wingnuts who never left America, who sputter and close their minds when faced with the truth that the two oil slicks illegally occupying the highest offices in this country, and most of their simple-minded but over-paid supporters stayed home in their warm ultra-wealthy beds. Look up the list of the chickenhawks who never touched any gun except their own personal manhood substitute. I dare you, right-wingnuts. Look at your heroes who never set foot in any place more dangerous than a bar. From Cheney to Limbaugh,cowards and draft dodgers and liars, all of them. No, this isn't about the hypocrisy being forced on what used to be a free country by our home-grown nazi goons. Everyone sane knows that the hypocrisy of the repukelican loyalists would make Satan blush. This is about "partisan politics," what the Clinton zipper-hunters of eight years had the absolute gall to call "the politics of personal destruction." This is about the lame excuses offered by the stupid sheep for the brain-dead nose-picker, who is (rightly) considered an idiot by [the world]. Ten thousand people recognized him as both worthless and dangerous in SWEDEN, for pity's sake.
It is not "partisan politics" to call a spade a spade. Karl and Ari, good students of Hitler's Goebbels, lied through their teeth from the day they walked into the White House where they Do Not Belong. The lies coming out of Washington are so many and so weird that they have already filled three books. But the soul-sold spinners continue desperately to try to hide criminal activity, incompetence, theft, and deadly intentions for the sake of short-term money behind the whine, "people are tired of partisan politics!" I was tired of partisan politics when Richard Mellon Scaife and Rupert Murdoch used their vast, billion-dollar media empire to further their racial hatred and gender bigotry by inventing and publicizing lies about Bill Clinton before he even took office. I was tired of partisan politics when a publicity-crazed bunch of incompetents, liars, and suckups to money...spent all their time panting with their hands down there than trying to get some real work done in a nation with huge resources and huge problems that could have been solved on a home computer, with the right impetus. I was tired of partisan politics when the timid democrats did not turn the tables on the thieves and liars who shut down the government just to get their pork barrels through, and failed to tell the scumbag illegitimate administration to put a sock on their nazi nominees. But investigating criminal activity is not partisan politics. The massive illegal insider trading and manipulation by the Bush team, from Rove's Intel stock to manipulation of Alcoa to theft from California energy companies, is a DAMN sight more important than who gave whom a rub in what hallway. I'll be officially tired of partisan politics when the dimwit chimp, all his handlers, and the felonious five who broke every law of the land to install him for their own personal profit, are all in jail. Not until then. --Dian, 6/20/01
posted on June 20, 2001 09:35:56 AM new
Supporters of this new fascist regeime in Washington would argure that Hypocracy in politics is nothing new, and if thier party dishes it out, it's because "they all do it." As if that makes all of their previous hypocritical hate-filled stands against honest candidates nothing more than blowing wind in your face! These Bush supporters stand for nothing, glorify hypocracy, and lack the mental power necessary to comprehend honor and commitment. Oh, sure! They'll come in here to bash me back! They'll say that I'm over-reacting to their dishonorable behavior. They complain that this messageboard is full of "Liberals" who don't know what they're talking about, even though we provide them with URLs to reliable sources. Only JLPiece has had the common sense to try to provide contrary URLs to dispute our findings. In the meantime, these fascists sit there with their fingers up their noses, just like their Glorius Leader in Washington and cry about how "unfair" we are to paint them their true colors!
posted on June 20, 2001 09:52:13 AM newBorillarSupporters of this new fascist regeime in Washington would argure that Hypocracy in politics is nothing new, and if thier party dishes it out, it's because "they all do it."
