posted on December 17, 2005 12:15:59 AM
Subject: FW: football fan humor
> An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when
> the old man passes gas and says, "Seven Points." His
> wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was
> that?" The old man replied, "It's fart football."
>
> A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says
> "Touchdown, tie score." After about five minutes the
> old man lets another one go and says, "Aha. I'm ahead
> 14 to 7."
>
> Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and
> says, "Touchdown, tie score." Five seconds go by and
> she lets out a little squeaker and says, "Field goal, I
> lead 17 to 14."
>
> Now the pressure is on the old man. He refuses to get
> beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since
> defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything
> he's got, and accidentally sh!ts in the bed.
>
> The wife says, "What the helll was that?" The old man
> says, "Half time, switch sides."
posted on December 19, 2005 12:46:23 PM
How to help the airline industry......
Replace all female flight attendants with good looking strippers.
What the hell? The attendants have gotten old and haggard looking. They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?
The strippers would double, triple, perhaps quadruple the alcohol consumption and get a "party atmosphere" going in the cabin. And they would no doubt work for tips, eliminating overhead for the airline companies.
Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women.
And, of course, every heterosexual businessman in this country would start flying again hoping to see naked women.
Hijackings would come to a screeching halt and the airline industry would see record revenue.
posted on December 19, 2005 02:11:12 PM
How to help the airline industry......
Replace all female flight attendants with good looking strippers.
Then where would Pi aka yellowstone go. He would not be able to afford the price of a plane ticket just to get a woman take off some clothing. Besides how would he be able to get a lap dance. The seats are just way to small.
Why do I still have to do everything myself?
Hooters air is close enough to what you are suggesting and it is not doing very well. That airline has already had to cancel flights. Perhaps you should start Christ Air and cater to all the right-winged religious freaks out there.
Absolute faith has been shown, consistently, to breed intolerance. And intolerance, history teaches us, again and again, begets violence.
---------------------------------- The duty of a patriot in this time and place is to ask questions, to demand answers, to understand where our nation is headed and why. If the answers you get do not suit you, or if they frighten you, or if they anger you, it is your duty as a patriot to dissent. Freedom does not begin with blind acceptance and with a flag. Freedom begins when you say 'No.'
posted on December 19, 2005 06:48:05 PM
Okay LD we will start an Airline with naked girly men and call it West Rear Air, (No seats everyone must stand) then everyone will be happy.
