posted on January 14, 2001 12:13:08 PM new
Just wanted to add another thought on temping. Many years ago, I worked as a placement counselor at a temp agency. I would absolutely like to second the notion that there are a lot of nuts that come into temp agencies and when they get anyone like you that is skilled and has any semblance of presentability and normalcy, they are ecstatic! TRUST ME ... THE TEMP AGENCIES WILL LOVE YOU. And, more important, they will place you!
posted on January 14, 2001 12:22:55 PM new
Higher power..
grant me the serenity to accept the things
I cannot change
Courage to change the things I can
And...the wisdom to know the difference...
posted on January 14, 2001 12:27:49 PM new
Sorry..I know it's hard. Been there myself more than once. Temp work worked into a permanent job for me. I have been at the same job for several years. It took a while..and I hated the temp work at first but it was the best thing I did. I have also been on public assistance more than once in the past. I called and called and eventually found help. The community colleges sometime have indigent funds available. They paid my electric bill once. If you call and persist things will fall into place. There are good people in the world but sometimes you have to search for that "pearl of great price". I feel this was a good thing for you even if it doesn't feel like it. My prayers are with you. Chin up.
posted on January 14, 2001 12:43:30 PM new
Hi boots! Can offer encouragement as I have suffered from depression all my life and finally, at the age of 45, started getting help and IT'S THE BEST THING I EVER DID!
Counseling and antidepressants work wonders in developing the ability to cope and start yourself in the right direction. I cannot stress this enough! It is so nice to get out of that hole. It was so comfortable there, albeit miserable, but once you start lifting yourself out with help you will BE SO GLAD YOU DID!!!
I am deeply touched by all the responses you have gotten from this group! YOU ALL ROCK!!
posted on January 14, 2001 12:43:46 PM new
cmbtboots- have you tried getting a telemarketing job? virtually every city has some company that does telemarketing. the hours are usually flexible and as long as you show up on time and can talk reasonably well you can get paid.
posted on January 14, 2001 12:56:58 PM new
I went through a period when I was right out of college where I was working off the books for a company. The company owners have since been arrested and charged with larceny (don't ask- it was a crooked company all around-thank God that was a long time ago).
Now, that I think about it, when I was willing to accept being paid off the books, it put me into contact with people who were not really good for me. The people I deal with now are better for me and my mental health. Including the fact that they don't carry around guns, deal drugs, etc, like the people I dealt with before.
So, my 2 cents, if you come clean with the IRS, and start paying what you owe, you could get the benefits of being open to a situation that would be better for you. (Instead of being scared that you are going to be found out all the time - that's very draining.)
posted on January 14, 2001 01:19:32 PM newBoots
You have some wonderful advice here but in case that black pit is swallowing you harder than you can fight right now, PLEASE consider going to a medical facility. Depression can be serious but it is also curable. You may need a little more help than our words can give. You may also get social services this way. I don't care how much money you owe the IRS, you are entitled to the same services as any one.
I hear desperation in your post. The bills are due, you have no means to pay them, you have children and you can't get out of your pjs. Please don't be offended that I suggest
getting help, I only do so out of concern.
I truly hope you see your way clear and life gets better and/or more bearable real soon.
posted on January 14, 2001 02:04:44 PM new
... and call your utilities companies. They might have programs that will cover the heating bills, etc. I pay extra on my electric bill each month to help with this. I wonder if you have a "woman's center" around. One I am familiar with helps with counseling, jobs, day care, financial assisstance - whatever - to get women back on their feet.
I know it's corny but I'm a blessings-counter: You don't want to work for a guy like that anyway, right? You weren't arrested. You have a son. You've found strangers here who are willing to help. You live in a country where there are places to go for help - United Way, the government, churches. What else????
posted on January 14, 2001 04:00:12 PM new
Hey Boots, where are you? If you have fallen in the dark hole of despair, come back up. There are willing hands here to help you help yourself. Stay in touch and try to avoid isolation. There is a lot of folks here that know you can do it. There is untold strength in the good vibes and prayers being sent your way.
posted on January 14, 2001 05:18:19 PM new
Cmdtboots,One day at a time honey,One day at a time.One problem at a time,What is faceing you right this minute.Some churchs will help you with a monthly house or apartment payment,For a couple of months.You have little ones,Talk to someone at the power supply about your temporary problem.The lights and heat will stay on.Most agencys
will help anyone with children,State and Fed.
Depressed?Get it in writeing,It is considered a mental condition,A disability.
The depression can be caused by the stress of oweing a huge tax bill.This would be understood by all.Look at the response here.
A mental inpairment(temp)is avoided by the IRS.(not mentaly capable)To handle buisness.This has to be in writeing.Any other illnesses?Asthma?Diabetes?(in writeing) The money under the table verses what you would have paid in losses,And liveing arangments.Any big difference?If not, the IRS would not, be interested.You would have been owed money,(which the IRS would have kept)If there are no great sums owed to them recently,Just an older bill.Get yourself stright,(job-auctions)Then go talk to a CPA to do your taxes and discuss submitting an offer in compromise,(pennys on the dollar)For
the old taxes.And the new ones if there is that much owed(I doubt)You cant afford this to be your top priority,At this time,If you are not in their system for immediate collection.IRS looks for the big money,If you dont have it,And in debt,Congrates! Hope this helps a little.
posted on January 14, 2001 06:10:37 PM new
Wow! I just logged on here and I am overcome by many of the responses. I really don't know where to begin. It is a very good thing this is not called the eBay video forum because I would hate for you guys to see me cry!
I guess it is something amazing when total strangers care enough to try to help. You people here are very dear to my heart. I have always been the type of person who has kept to myself and I really don't have a huge group of friends and there is not any one I can really unload on and somehow it is easier to talk about something to total strangers because we are all faceless and it is safer.
gravid Yes, I have a car.
As far as job skills go, I have not really had a 9-5 type job since 16. I have always been self employed. had a small in home gift basket business for several years, but the business dwindled down so much over the years due to local competition. I eventually sold all my gift basket supplies on eBay. It was amazing to see all the inventory I worked so hard for being sold for so little. But I guess that is the beauty of eBay, one can always find a great deal, hu?
As far as computer skills go, I am a hunt and pecker.
As far as college goes, I never graduated, I took the LSAT and did pretty good but then with the stupidity of youth I decided to take time off to decide what I wanted to do and I never did go back. Now it has been so long ago I feel as if I have lost most of what I learned I just don't remember much of what I learned. I took a lot of classes that probably would not be of much use, like english, poly science.
Whatever you do you are going to have to pay the IRS some payment plan. It won't go away unless you are prepared to leave the country.
NOT A BAD IDEA
Like I said earlier I am a single parent. I just do not understand how single parents can work real life jobs. Last month my son was sick with a bad cold, not sick enough to lay in bed but sick enough that I can't send him to school and I can't take him to a daycare because his cold was probably infectious. I don't have anybody that can take him. So he missed 3 weeks of school. No employer is going to allow an employee to do that. How do you hold down a regular full time job?
Taking a temp job is a good idea but the daycare costs will take out way too much. Ideally I want to find a way to be at home. I always felt that if you have kids you need to raise them and if there is any way for one parent to stay at home then they should. I know I have been way blessed and lucky to have been able to stay home with my son and not have to put him in someone else's care for 8 or more hours a day.
kerryann what you said about the ten year thing with the IRS, it is at the 8 1/2 year point. They do know where I am because they send me updated statements ever once in a while. At one point I was told they pretty much had me in an "uncollectable" file. Does this mean I am free and clear in ten years or can the dept be renewed if they have had contact with me?
heartsong
thank you, thank you, thank you!]
chococakewrote, Ask friends and relatives if they would be willing to give you things that they would have donated or thrown away.
I don't really have people I can go to and ask and besides that kind of thing is so damn hard for me to do!! Why is it so much easier to give that receive?
Shoshanah wrote, Meanwhile, speak to the Landlord; not all of them are ogres; and count your blessings that you have Superman: a child will often soften many hearts.
I am very luck as far as landlords go. A few years ago I did not have a car and he told me not to worry about paying rent for a few months until I could get a car. I still owe about 1/2 of my rent for Jan. I just hate to be such a flake because he has always been so kind to my son and me. AND I look at my son daily and think, "oh my gosh, I actually made this kid! I figure I must have had some amazingly great karma from another life to wind up with my son, either that or someone upstairs screwed up and gave me the wrong kid.
STEVE & KERRIANNthank you for you very generous offers. I am so touched you guys would consider sending a total stranger your products. I really can't accept your offers. I don't know when I would be able to pay you back.
nanastuff Utah
There is so much more I want to say but I have to sign off for a while. For some reason my son thinks he wants dinner. Kids, all they do is take, take, take. just kidding!
Seriously, I am so grateful to each and everyone of you here who has answered my post. thank you
posted on January 14, 2001 06:35:45 PM newkerryann what you said about the ten year thing with the IRS, it is at the 8 1/2 year point. They do know where I am because they send me updated statements ever once in a while. At one point I was told they pretty much had me in an "uncollectable" file. Does this mean I am free and clear in ten years or can the dept be renewed if they have had contact with me?
Unless you sign something giving them the okay to extend the ten year deadline, or if you filed for bankruptcy during the ten year period, the debt goes away after ten years. Just as an aside, if you did file for bankruptcy during that 10 year period, the deadline is extended only the amount of time that it took for the bankruptcy process to be completed.
STEVE & KERRIANN thank you for you very generous offers. I am so touched you guys would consider sending a total stranger your products. I really can't accept your offers. I don't know when I would be able to pay you back.
I don't want any payback at all. I wish you would e-mail me. I have some stuff sitting around here that I'm dying to get rid of. I was considering renting a table at a flea market next month to get rid of it, but I would much, much rather send it to you. There are no strings attached at all.
posted on January 14, 2001 06:53:36 PM new
Combatboots, don't forget to look around your house, there have to be things you don't need anymore that you can sell on eBay.
Like I said earlier, I almost threw out some items, but sold them on eBay, for example, three Ikea catalogs (1995, 1996 and 2000) brought me $15. Old magazines have lots of good ads and articles. I sell lots of those on eBay.
Just make sure you have enough money to send them out incase people use PayPal and you have to wait to get your money.
Maybe some of your son's old toys or clothes could be sold on eBay.
posted on January 14, 2001 07:09:42 PM new
wow..this thread has driven me to tears....i have been and am now going thru an extremely difficult financial time also....due to illness...BUT, i never had the guts to bring anything to this place...except a whine or 2....reading this has made me see not only that THERE ARE SOLUTIONS and that OTHERS REALLY DO CARE...all you have to do is ask; i can't believe the generousity of all of you and i already feel helped and less desparate than i have been; in short, THANK ALL OF YOU FOR YOUR GENEROUSITY & KINDNESS; COMBAT...great words of wisdom from all these guys....thank god for you and superman...he is blessed to have a mom like you...YOU CAN DO IT!!!!
posted on January 14, 2001 07:21:26 PM new
I should also mention that it is worth selling inexpensive items. Most of of what I sell, sells for under $20, sometimes $5. I was surprised how fast it added up when I didn't touch it for a few weeks.
Before I knew it, I had a few hundred dollars, and that is substatial. If you spend every $10 or $20 as it arrives, it doesn't seem like much. Wait for 10 or 20 payments like that to come in, and voilą!
You may have already known this, but I thought I'd pass it along for others who may have not thought about it.
posted on January 14, 2001 07:36:50 PM new
Combatboots - You've gotten a lot of good advice here on ways to overcome your present situation. I would like to reinforce and add to that. I am a counselor, and the most immediate need that I hear right now is a medical one. Please, please, please see a doctor asap. Keep your eye on your little one...he needs you, and he is a blessing. Depression can be overwhelming, and if you can't make any other calls at this time at LEAST make one to a physician. There are medications that can help you to see life differently. Right now you need support, and that should certainly be one of your first steps. A good physician can help you immensely in helping yourself, and in connecting you with any needed social services in your area. My other recommendation which you may or may not heed is to contact a local church which you may have connections with. Churches often have financial resources to help in immediate situations such as yours, as well as food banks, and counseling to help those who are in your situation. I know that mine does, and would go all out to help someone in your situation. If you will let Him, it's amazing what God can do in your life. You have touched my heart deeply, and I am praying for you constantly. Please, please, please do not mix drugs with alcohol...it can be, and often is, deadly. Again, I am praying for you and you have many here who care. Please let us know how you are doing.
posted on January 14, 2001 07:50:14 PM new
undercovers - I'm so sorry to hear about your hardships also. I also think there are many caring people here. We may disagree about politics and get in some heated debates about that and other things. But, when someone needs help you see we can come together.
boots - I was very happy you came back to post, I thought about you all day.
Don't be emabarassed about asking others for their unwanted items. People will have more respect for you when they see you have a goal an are willing to work towards it.
That being said I know when you are that depressed you don't have will to do anything let alone list things on eBay. You didn't mention getting help with your depression. You've admitted it's there, that's the first step, but you have to do something about it. Please let that be your first call. You have to have a clear head to be able to do anything about the other problems. I too have lived with depression and I know what it's like to be overwhelmed and just not get dressed and pull those covers over your head.
posted on January 14, 2001 09:26:47 PM new
cmbtboots
A few months ago in the space of two weeks the following happened: my best friend's mother had both of her hips replaced, her father was diagnosed with cancer, my father-in-law went on dialysis, my father was diagnosed with cancer, they found more cancer on my friend's father, they wanted to put my father-in-law on the transplant list, and my mother-in-law was hospitalized with possible cancer. Then my brother-in-law and sister-in-law decided to get divorced.
Because of that I lost both my babysitter and my back up babysitter. Without a sitter, I knew I had to sell my store. I thought I was going to lose my mind.
Then - as I was trying to sell my store I met someone on the internet who had an incredible idea for a business. One that will change my life forever. I have been working day and night trying to get it all together. In the meantime, however, I must struggle to survive just as most on eBay.
Along comes that game with the incredible bids. I read your post and decided that I, too must find a way to help you. I could send you stuff to sell but others have offered that to you. In fact, it brought tears to my eyes that people are so caring.
My auction ends in just a few short days. I will send to you 10% of whatever the final bid is. If you have a PayPal account I will deposit it into that so you can have it quickly. I am in PA. If you would like I could UPS a check to you. The choice is yours.
AND if you would email your address to me I would like to send a little surprise out to Superman.
posted on January 14, 2001 09:43:49 PM new
Boots,Don't count on the 10 year thing too much.All the IRS has to do is renew the same tax papers at the court house.Of course the penaltys and interest continue.Where I live,There is no such thing as giving your permission for the IRS to continue the lien.The IRS always renews unless the agent goofed up and forgot to send the papers to the County court house.The new tax laws are
Just as confuseing as they have ever been,Having a good CPA on your side,Makes the law livable.And if they renew,No big deal,Call them if you don't have a CPA(Renew)
And tell them nothing has changed.This will give you time.In other words,Dont worry about about it.Time for yourself now.Why dont you go to the round table here at the Auction watch,VeryModern has a thread going with over 600 posts,You may be able to come up, with something there to help you out.The thread has helped a lot of folks.Just a thought,if you get the chance.
posted on January 14, 2001 09:45:56 PM new
I posted my reply after just reading page one. Then I caught your reply.
When I was a child my older brother was hit by a school bus. The pointy bone at the base of his skull (in the back in the middle - it is called the ocipital bone) shattered. He was in a coma for a while.
Because the bus (and others that followed it) were loaded with children, many people were concerned and held masses, prayed, and lit candles for him.
One day the brain surgeon came in and told my parents that the bone had re-fused. He told them it shouldn't happen, that it doesn't happen, but in this instance it did.
He told them that they were the recipients of a miracle.
Because God gave my brother back to me I try to help others when I can. Even my eBay name comes from adopting children at Christmastime!
I'm sure everyone will agree with me that the best way you could repay them is to someday help someone who is in need. After all, isn't that the way life is supposed to be?
Now, please email us and let us help you. Believe me, the satisfaction I get from helping someone helps get through my bad times.
You could help me by saying a prayer for both of my children's grandfathers. I would appreciate that.
posted on January 14, 2001 11:18:40 PM new
To everyone on this thread:
I just looked at Boots' auctions...she has some nice things up for bid. Check them out.
posted on January 15, 2001 12:58:08 AM new
Hi, CB. Your post reminds me of my own situation a little.
I was homeless (for nearly 10 years), lived through a major earthquake, a terrorist bombing, drug addiction, been diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic, post-traumatic stress disorder ... and those were the highlights!
When I started selling on eBay I was receiving rent subsidy and government disability. I tried to keep my eBay income down at the hobby level, but when I hit sales of $200 a month, I lost the benefits. I found myself suddenly needing to earn at least $2000 a month, with no capital and almost no college education. I did it by selling information guides on eBay.
I won't make any suggestions to you. I just want to say that things work out for the better. Who knows what good may come of this? It may be an opportunity for you to make one of those life assessments. Don't worry, you will be okay.
BTW, I am facing a surgery next month and I am totally scared over it.
posted on January 15, 2001 02:04:53 AM new
Tonight while cooking dinner there was a commercial on that really hit home. On the screen it said, "Want to get rich quick?" "Count your blessings". I turned off dinner and went outside on the back steps and sobbed.
I KNOW this commercial was meant for me to see. When I count my blessings you amazing people are at the top of my list. It is so unbelievably easy to just dwell on problems until they seem insurmountable.
I know my life is not going to change overnight and I want you to know I will try to contact a doctor or other professional on Tuesday. I certianly could use a good head shrinking and a rubber room!
I think I am going to jump in and attempt to "do" eBay full time. No time like the present and after all how much worse can things get?? Nevermind, don't answer that.
At least I don't sell on yahoo. ha/ha
In all seriousness you guys have been a godsend the past couple days. I realize people do care about me. You have no idea how much you affect (or is it effect?? What college??) my life. In reality you have saved me in more ways than you will ever know and I am so grateful to everyone who has posted here.
posted on January 15, 2001 05:34:15 AM new
Email me your address, I have a thing or two to send and I'll send them with good description ideas. I've received a bounty of help from the most wonderful people in the world. I was down bad hun....BAD.
posted on January 15, 2001 05:49:07 AM new
Lori -
Some SURE sellers on eBay can be surprisingly cheap in thrift stores and yard sales. Not usually high-dollar sales, but fairly easy to find, easy to ship, easy to store, and the demand is solid. Don't worry about getting an occasional dud ... the objective is to make a profit on the total sales.
1. Counted cross stitch brochures, especially for certain designers. Check completed auctions to see what's hot.
2. Small chunks of fabric suitable for quilts (100% cotton, shirt-weight, interesting colors ... I even sold a laundry basket FULL of scraps of this) With a preferred size of 18x22, called a "fat Quarter" and sold in small groups (keep it right under 2 pounds, start bidding at $.75 to $85 per fat quarter, charge Priority and shove them into a Priority envelope). You can find cheap and unusual prints at "fabric by the pound" places or if you can get a good deal on a 100% cotton dress with a long and full skirt ... recycle. I paid $2.50 at a thrift store for a size 18 designer dress with a ripped-up sleeve, and got $20 for the fabric in the skirt.
Some books about quilting are in high demand.
3. VINTAGE (1940s and earlier) crochet books and knitting books, or any tatting books form almost any era.
4. WIERD cookbooks ... nothing microwave, nothing by a publisher you recognize, none of those family circle encyclopedia things ... but ethnic cookbooks SELL, and DESSERT and other "single-food" cookbooks sell.
5. Systematically study books on antiques and collectibles, starting with what's plentiful in your area, and keep an eye on what's hot on eBay. Don't try to make a living at this, but if you happen to spot a vintage piece of china that has a good market for CHEAP, buy it.
Whatever you do, DO NOT FALL for a multi-level marketing scheme! They make it sound really great, but the financial facts are that the money all flows up to the higher-ups and damn little stays with the low-level suckers. If you have to pay to join, DON'T! If they aren't willing to pay you to work for them, they aren't worth it.
I can't add anything to all the good advice
in this thread.
Just want to add my good wishes!
That's a beautiful gravy boat in your auction! Hope I can snag that item!
I live in the Maryland, DC area. If I
can help you out in any way, please email
me.
posted on January 15, 2001 06:38:24 AM new
CMBOOTS,
I read your post and I know how it feels to be at the bottome. I sympathize deeply. I have never posted on these boards before but I feel compelled to post to you. You do have options, just keep trying. People here seem to be very kind. I have a suggestion and please take it however you like it. I feel silly even suggesting it. But I do it and I know most people make pretty good money at it. Sell Avon. This month is free to sign up. I know that there are some people in my district that make upwards of $80,000 a year(I dont make that much). You may not make that much but it may be enough to help you out now. I am so sorry for the trouble that you are going through. I hope things get better. If you ever need to talk my icq # is 19272649. My email address is [email protected]. I hope that this helps.
Hope this helps a little.