posted on February 7, 2002 11:39:09 PM new
maybe we should all go bid on her stuff and make her wait like 30 days for the $$ and then not send it... ha ha
posted on February 9, 2002 05:49:53 PM new
bettylou,
One of my auctions ended yesterday. The buyer e-mailed me that she'll send a money order, but she's going out of town on family emergency and won't be able to buy a MO until Mon/Tues. Should I start worrying. I've heard this before. Someone you know? Ha Ha
posted on February 9, 2002 06:00:43 PM new
Nah, I actually hear this a lot. If you don't hear back from her Monday or Tuesday, you can drop her a note Wednesday, politely hoping everything turned out OK in the family emergency and that works as a reminder.
If she says "what family emergency?" you know how to proceed.
posted on February 10, 2002 12:08:49 PM new
What does all this show us?
The cold facts are:
1.) Ebay does not assist sellers and are only interested in maximizing revenues.
2.) Increased deadbeats on ebay that merely change their IDs. Both sellers and buyers..
3.) Aweebit should have sent payment IMMEDIATELY via CERTIFIED mail ASAP.
4.) This country is in trouble because basic values and civility has broken down when people want something for NOTHING.
5.) Sorry WEEBIT that you are disabled and that you have to sell on EBay to make a living. But these kinds of things scare off people from Ebay and has the effect of destroying the marketplace.
posted on February 13, 2002 04:58:16 PM new
bettylou
Sorry, been out of contact and didn't see your question till now...you don't owe her an apology. Didn't mean to imply that.
To answer your question, I have learned (via personal experience) that a person can come across as rude (especially with email) without any intentions whatsoever. For example, I was reprimmanded once for not responding to a 'Good Morning' greeting in a hallway. Despite the fact that I did not hear the 'Good Morning', much less look at him, that person reported me to my boss as 'rude'. Was I? Not to my mind. But in that person's mind I was. And, although I didn't agree with this...I apologized to him with a 'I am sorry I did not respond....'. What I was thinking was 'I am sorry you are without a life that you had to start my day with a #*!@ about...' But I digress.
That was 15 years ago and it was extremely hard for me to apologize for something I did not do. But fortunately, as time goes on the apologizing has gotten easier to do (and I have had to do so a few more times) that it now has become automatic.
So to finish, what I should have written was 'she apolgizes for the bad check' you would write in response something along the line of 'I am sorry you are having this difficulty, I wasn't intentionally being rude but wanted to know when can I expect payment?'.
posted on February 14, 2002 07:57:23 AM new
Hi deuchler:
What a great personal anecdote. Here's a thought: Once you run your own eBay business, you'll never be reported or reprimanded for not saying "Good morning" to anyone! Thank you for reminding me of the joys of being my own boss!
I think the point you made was a good one. I also think, though, that when someone is grasping at straws to justify their injured feelings (caused wholly by their own rotten behavior) people will make such claims. You were rude. You insulted me. You never answered my email.
Fortunately though, as I've said before, we really only get about one person in 100 who is like this, and that's certainly bearable.
Can I share with you what I wrote yesterday to another deadbeat after our initial "Your check bounced" email went ignored for 10 days?
"Frankly, we are disappointed that you have not responded to our notification that your check bounced and that this matter has not been resolved in a prompt businesslike manner. Most people who bounce checks are good folks who just made a mistake. They are anxious to get the matter straightened out to preserve their reputation.
"There are a few, however, whose intent may be fraudulent. In these cases, we have a number of remedies open to us.
1) Opening a fraud case with your local police department
2) Turning the account over to a collection agency
3) Reporting the bad check to eBay's SafeHarbor, where your account may come under review
4) Pursuing our claim under California's Bad Check Law, which allows for damages three times the face value of the check.
"Please contact us to get this settled."
I got a response within an hour.
One final note: the BidPay payment from aweebitowhatever arrived yesterday.
posted on February 14, 2002 08:50:19 AM new
Bettylou,
Beter make a dash to the bank, and cash that money order as soon as you can. I know money orders are as good as gold, but I have seen gold turn green MANY times before.
signed,
The "always wanting to make you laugh" King
posted on February 14, 2002 03:21:42 PM new
Congrats on the check! And happy you enjoyed my personal tidbit. A friend recently told me, 'Don't let anyone rent space in your brain'. It's a good one to remember and follow. Hopefully this help will slow down those ever increasing number of white hairs appearing on my head.
posted on February 19, 2002 01:20:15 PM new
Guess what, “Betty”!!! Here’s another person that made the mistake of clicking on one of your auctions and ended up regretting it instantly. Before you started this thread, you had only left rotten, unfair feedback and I wasn’t going to dignify your pettiness with much of a response. I know the truth and my buyers/other sellers know the truth. I would be the bigger person were I to keep my mouth shut. Yes, it would have been taking the high road, but I figured I would join you on your one way street to the nuthouse for a bit to clarify some things for you.
I am copying the text that refers to my situation in order to refresh your memory:
"Thanks, richierich. I'm planning a wee bit of payback today on a different bidder who bounced a check on us in late November, then sent five paragraphs worth of husband-got-laid-off rolling-pennies-to-feed-kids it-will-be-an-empty-Christmas someday-it'll-happen-to-you daytime drama.
I checked her bidding yesterday and she had won over 40 auctions in January. Time to run that NSF check through her account again.
Funny, she lives in Colorado, too.
If not for you, richierich, I'd think there was something in the water.
Smart move bettylou. Get your check cashed before she pays on all those new auctions.
In reference to Ms. Rolling-Pennies-To-Feed-My-Kids, the check verifies as GOOD!
Bwah-hah-HAH!
I'm off to the bank!
It's February 5th... payday, right? (Ha.)
Good for you for following up on the rolling pennies gal. I hope you're able to nail this latest gem of a bidder."
Just a couple of corrections here, “Betty”...
I do not live in Colorado; I live in Tennessee. Guess that means that the only thing “in the water” is whatever is making you hallucinate.
I have not won 40 auctions in January. Hell, I’ve only conducted 42 auctions in the last six months and that includes the ones where I was also the seller. I have won 23 auctions in the last month. Half were for clothes for my daughter and son, who decided to go through a growing spurt. The other half of the auctions were for items that I knew that I could resell at a profit. You see, I am still trying to earn extra money since my husband was laid off until just a week ago. I am on disability due to a car wreck that resulted in the lower half of my spine being rebuilt with rods, bolts and plates. eBay is the only means that I have found to help contribute to the well-being of my family. If I see the opportunity to make some money, then I do so. God forbid. I chose to buy the kids’ clothes off of eBay because I couldn’t afford to buy new ones. I guess they should have run around without clothes? (BTW, February 3rd was my disability payday, so “HA” right back at ya.)
When I emailed you I NEVER said that my kids were starving. Let's review, shall we?
I was looking for jewelry for a theme wedding that I was going to. I had searched in vain until I ran across Betty’s site. I found a nice bracelet and earrings and placed a bid. I was just a few days away from the wedding at that point and I was (obviously) desperate. It was totally my fault that I didn’t read the novel of do’s and don’ts that she has. I wish to heaven that I had before I bid. As I said, I was desperate to find the jewelry. Due to her many rules, it was a couple of weeks after the wedding before I received the jewelry. As I said, it was my fault that I didn’t read her book of regulations before bidding. In the interim between the time that I won the auction and when she deposited the check, two things happened. One – A few days into November, the company that my husband had worked for closed their doors. Permanently. No warning. Two – the water pump went out on my husband’s truck. No transportation means that you can’t look for a job.
You see, when I bid, won and sent a check for the jewelry, my husband was making a decent living. We have 2 kids, a lovely house, 2 vehicles and pets. We are your normal, middle class family. Not living above our means necessarily, but not being misers, either. I’ve always tried to buy good, used clothes and good, used cars - tried to be smart about things. Back in October, we had next to nothing in the savings account because we had just moved. Down payments, etc., had taken all of our savings. Little did we know that hubby’s employer was going belly up in less than a month.
When I was inquiring about payment, shipping, etc., I wrote “Betty” an extremely nice and warm email, explaining that I was desperate to get the jewelry for this once in a lifetime wedding and would she help get it to me a little quicker? I sell on eBay too and I have always helped my customers whenever I could. Of course, I know that everyone does not subscribe to my theory on how to treat the people that are buying your merchandise. You know, the ones that keep you in business…..
Please keep in mind that this email was extremely polite. If you read my feedback, you will see that a lot of the people leave feedback regarding how friendly my emails are: along with the speed of my payments. At the time, I had no reason to be anything other than friendly to “Betty”. Her response however was rude, terse and unequivocally NO. Okay – it’s her business; it’s her rules. However, this was WAY before the check incident. She had no reason in the world to be rude to me. But that sure didn’t stop her. Yes, I know her rules are clearly posted. I have rules in my listings as well, but if someone has a special request – I accommodate them if possible. Again, I know that her way of doing “business” and my way are totally different. After reading her posts, I now know why. Her view of other people and my view of others is the polar opposite of each other. Of course the way we treat our customers is going to be different as well. Fine.
I put the check in the mail and was really surprised when I received the jewelry before the check cleared. I won’t mention here what I thought about someone sending out items before they were paid for, but again, it’s her thing – not mine. I posted feedback, describing only the items because I could not leave praise for the business owner herself. She was just too rude and for absolutely no reason at all. She acted like I had broken 9 out of the 10 Commandments by merely asking her a question. Sorry I wasted her time. Hers is obviously so much more valuable than mine.
A few days later, the bottom fell out of our world. Hubby was laid off. No notice, no warning, no nothing. As he was a contract employee, he couldn’t draw unemployment. This was no one’s fault and we weren’t asking for a handout from anyone.
When the water pump went out on my husband’s truck, we had exactly $62.00 in the bank. I went to the auto parts store and purchased a rebuilt water pump for $48.00, which left a whopping $14.00 in our bank account. I was scrambling around, trying to get funds in the bank to cover outstanding checks when “Betty” notified me that she had received my check back. I immediately emailed her back, telling her that I had been afraid that it would go through before I could get the money back in the account. I explained to her exactly what happened – I was not trying to screw her out of any money in any way, shape or form. I apologized profusely and explained the situation to her. As she had been completely rude in her previous emails, I went into detail with my explanation – hoping that she had a human side to her somewhere. I told her that we had no money to buy groceries, pay bills, etc. and that I didn’t know how I could pay her for the items. HOWEVER, I did tell her that I would gladly send her the jewelry back, pay her $5.00 bank fee and pay her listing fees so that she would not be out any money because of me. No matter the circumstances, I was still responsible for rectifying the situation – which I tried to do to the best of my ability. Instead of responding to me, she went and left feedback, saying something like, “Gave sob story about starving kids – this is JEWELRY NOT FOOD” (what the hell ever that meant). Then she emails me back saying, “Absolutely not – you will pay for the items.” She then proceeded with her threats. Up until this point, I had been in constant contact with her. I had been totally apologetic and willing to do my best to work this out. She decided to leave feedback, stating things that were not true before giving me a chance to work it out. The wording of her feedback was, in essence, making fun of the situation that my family was in. Had I intentionally tried to defraud her out of $24.99 of jewelry, I never would have been in contact with her after the fact, nor would I have offered to send the bracelet and earrings back to her. I did not give her a sob story of any type. I told her the truth – that since I purchased the items, our world had unexpectedly turned upside down. It can happen to anyone. It was totally uncalled for her to leave the feedback that she did. It was not a sob story – it was the absolute truth. I have the receipts for the water pump purchase, bank statements and a reference letter from my husband’s previous boss stating that the business had indeed closed and that was the only reason that he was no longer employed. I have all the proof needed to back up my explanation. Didn’t matter one whit to this person, though. Her attitude absolutely boggled my mind. If I had totally ignored her requests – hey fine, get pissy. However, if someone tries to work out the situation – being human will get your money a whole lot faster than being a satanically possessed hound from hell.
I took the same stance as the other girl that you have chosen to ridicule and vilify on this board. I did try to work things out, as I did owe you the money for the jewelry that I couldn’t use. I took responsibility and I was definitely apologetic. However, when you decided to be completely irrational and totally ugly to someone that was going through absolute hell, then I just put you in the back of my mind. I had enough to worry about, just keeping the lights on and food on the table. People in general are not real responsive to someone who publicly kicks you when you are at your lowest point. I had never done anything to you in my life and did not deserve your abuse – especially after trying to do the only thing I could afford to do and send the items back and cover your fees. Yes, I understand that I was required to resolve the situation, but My God woman - you made it purposely difficult for anyone to have any desire to want to pay you. You were/are deliberately mean. You didn’t give a damn, why should I?? On one side, our lights, water, phone, etc., were cut off more than once. One the other side, I have you – someone who is interested only in making everyone else’s life as miserable as your own. Gee, I wonder who is going to get paid first?
Well, a few weeks ago, my husband obtained a new job. Yes, you were on the list to get paid, but needless to say, you weren’t right up there with groceries. You decided to redeposit the check that I wrote to you first. Not that I blame you – I would have done the same thing in that instance. What I want to get through your weird head is this: Had you not been such an insanely ugly person, this situation would have been rectified long ago. Yes, I owed the money, but it is no one’s fault other than your own that you weren’t paid before now. I apologized many times for the situation that prevented me from honoring the check that I wrote – which was absolutely good when I wrote it.
I tried to make it right. You made it impossible. I just want to know one thing – who do you think you are, anyway? Who died and gave you the right to treat people with nothing but disdain? And HOW DARE YOU make fun and gloat over the fact that we didn’t know how we were going to put food on the table, keep a roof over our head and try to give my children some sort of Christmas? I’m glad it was so easy for you to ridicule one of the most difficult times in a mother’s life – trying to figure out how to take care of her children with no money. I’m really happy that it was so humorous to you. I hope it gave you tons of laughs. Quite frankly, you and your insane attitude make me sick.
As soon as I received the auction items to begin with, I almost returned them before my check even went through. Your refusal to be reasonable kept me from getting the items when I needed them. I didn’t need costume jewelry for any other reason than the wedding. However, since you were totally rude BEFORE my payment was returned, I decided to just keep the items rather than have to deal with you ever again. Of course, had I known my husband was going to lose his job, I would have sent them back to you immediately. I have several ideas as to where you could have “re-stocked” them.
Everyone on this board can jump on me all you want to. You can yell at me and tell me how it’s all my fault, blah, blah, blah. I DID take responsibility for the fact that the check was returned. I DID apologize. More than once. I DID try to resolve the situation immediately after “Betty” notified me of the situation. I DID NOT, however, ask to be treated as a criminal for an honest mistake. I don’t understand who gave “Betty” the authority to be judge, jury and executioner for a situation that SHE KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT. You can tell me all you want to that she can be rude and hateful to someone who has a returned check. However, the facts are this:
The money was there when I wrote the check. My husband was employed and things were going well. We had no reason to think that things would be otherwise in the coming weeks.
She was rude, hateful, obnoxious and totally unaccommodating prior to the transaction even taking place. You cannot say that it was the situation with my payment that caused her to be that way. (Best I can tell she was BORN that way.)
Oh, just a couple of other things, “Betty”.
1. You called my situation a “sob story”. It cracks me up that potentially losing everything and not being able to provide for your children is a “sob story” – yet you can devote eight pages of a thread to the fact that you had a couple of returned checks. What the hell do you call that, miss drama queen?
2. Are you bright enough to realize that, had you accepted the return of your items and the offer to replace bank fees, you would not have lost anything – but since you chose to be obstinate and rude, you are out the fees that I offered to pay?
I took the little tidbit of advice at the bottom of your correspondence that says, “You might want to contact your attorney for this.” I have a friend that is an attorney. I contacted him, not to see what you could do to me – quite the opposite. My friend told me that threatening someone with criminal charges in a civil matter is called extortion. Did you know that we could file charges against YOU? You might want to know of which you speak prior to running off at the mouth. The fact that the check I wrote was returned was and is a civil matter. It was not written on a closed account and I can show anyone my bank statement, which will show that the funds were in there when I wrote the check. There was no intent to defraud in any manner; therefore, it is a civil matter. This is just a little piece of advice before you go threatening to publicly post someone’s checks on-line, posting signs in a local grocery store, calling their family, etc. To insinuate that you are going to contact local law enforcement, harass someone’s family, advertise your libelous and vicious words – all of these “scare tactics” are punishable under the law. PLUS, you might want to get your story straight on the actual events before you post your “oh, woe is me” sob story about having a couple of returned checks. Many of your details about my transaction, as well as others, are blatant lies.
I want to thank you for saving me the money that it would have cost to send your payment to you. When you made fun of the fact that we had to roll change to buy food, you gave me an idea. I had made up my mind that your payment was going to come in the form of 2,999 pennies. Loose pennies. Sure, it would have cost me a bit for postage, but it sure would have been worth it. What could you have done? Pennies are legal tender, too.
In closing, “Betty”, I have only this to say:
The last few months have been sheer hell on earth for my family. I don’t expect sympathy from anyone because we happen to be having a hard time. It’s called life. The only reason that I told you what was going on to start with was so that you would know that I was not deliberately writing bad checks. I do not work that way. I wasn’t trying to get out of paying – I was merely letting you know the FACTS. You took that information, threw it back in my face, made fun of our situation in feedback and gloated about it on this board. You know, if I had the choice to either live like we have had to in the last few months, or live like you – I would choose to be broke, hungry and living in a tent under a bridge rather than be like you. I have never come into contact with a more wretched, pitiful, unbearable person in my life. Anyone that can make fun of someone else’s adversity, definitely has something seriously lacking in their own life. Though I feel anger, contempt and disgust for the things you said about my family’s situation, primarily, I feel pity for you. To simply live in your skin must be the most horrible thing in the world. In your own words, you are cynical and have a dark view of human nature. I feel so sorry for you because you are missing so much. How sad.
Respond to this post however you wish to – it doesn’t matter to me. You managed to kick me when I was down once – you shall not do it again, so don’t even waste your time. Let me make one thing crystal clear though – if you do respond in a derogatory, flaming, disparaging manner, please make absolutely sure that you have your facts straight before posting.
Have a nice life. I know I will now that you are out of mine.
P.S. – I know you won’t understand the car problems that we had – not with your fantastic little car! The only thing you have to worry about is whether your extension cord is long enough. Does it go from zero to sixty in one day or two? What is the average cruising speed on the car – around 14mph? How many kilowatts per mile do you get??? I’m sure people think that it is great that you have an electric car instead of an internal combustion engine. You probably have everyone fooled into thinking that you have a great cause: that you stand for something. My guess would be that this is all the car you could handle – anything else would just be too much for you. You seem mighty brave behind the keyboard. Something tells me that in reality, you aren’t all that much. Your car has to be plugged in like a toaster for Heaven’s sake. In theory, it could save you a lot of money on therapy for your problems, though. You could have do-it-yourself shock therapy!!
Like I said, I could have taken the high road – I usually do. However, coming down to your level was a bit fun. Thanks for giving me such a great target….
posted on February 19, 2002 01:55:24 PM new
Betty, I have followed this thread faithfully, and I don't believe you can even comprehend what bpwilson just said. You just don't get it. Yes, you have reason to be angry about bad checks, anyone would be. But I think you would be disappointed if you didn't have them. I think you have enjoyed trashing these people and making them look and feel like vermin. Heaven forbid if all your transactions went smooth as silk. You must be enjoying all the attention this thread is giving you and are now doctoring episodes up to suit yourself. These ladies stories ring true; yours do not. I'm not defending their bad checks, I AM defending their right to be treated in a just and truthful way. Your true character has been pretty obvious to me through the statements you have made here.
posted on February 19, 2002 03:58:29 PM new
Well, it took me a while to read through the whole saga, but I did. A couple of thoughts here:
Betty clearly has some problems with buyers thinking she is rude. I looked at all her neutrals and negs - the most common comments were about rudeness and slow shipping. I did read her terms, and I avoid sellers like this, because it's clear to me that if a problem arises, they don't want to take the time to deal with ya.
Betty, how long do you usually wait to ship? You have lots of comments of buyers waiting a month to get their items. Also, in your TOS it states that you can only get tracking with Express mail - what's wrong with using Priority mail w/delivery confirmation for tracking as a cheaper alternative?
Regardless of all that, it isn't ok to be sending out NSF checks, and when buyers do that, they should be bending over backwards to recify the situation ASAP no matter what.
Sending forms of payments that sellers don't accept (PayPal for instance), hardly qualifies as an honest attempt at payment. Sellers have every right to decide what they'll take in the way of payment and as long as it is clearly spelled out in their TOS, buyer's are at fault when they try to use a non-approved form of payment later. I did notice several neutrals the seller had for not taking PayPal - a totally bogus complaint assuming that it was in the seller's TOS at the time (bidders who don't read can sure be infuriating).
BPwilson: Ya know, I have one major problem with your story. I believe perhaps she was rude - but what bothers me is that you made it clear that you would have gotten her paid sooner if she hadn't been rude. You don't question that you owed her the money.
So let's see: buyer bids on item without throughly reading seller's TOS. Seems a safe bet that the buyer didn't read the seller's feedback well enough or she would have realized that communication might just be a problem. Buyer asks for special shipping, seller apparently didn't care to change her TOS after the auction (who knows how that exchange went...hard to guess w/out seeing the e-mails). Geeze, it is the usual deal where most of this could have been avoided with an e-mail BEFORE bidding and the buyer doing their homework on the seller (acceptable TOS and feedback). This aint rocket science, folks!
And this really bothers me - a quote from BPWilson,
"You managed to kick me when I was down once – you shall not do it again, so don’t even waste your time. Let me make one thing crystal clear though – if you do respond in a derogatory, flaming, disparaging manner, please make absolutely sure that you have your facts straight before posting."
After which, she writes absolutely mean rubbish about the seller's car! What has that got to do with anything?? Seems to me to fit the "derogatory, flaming, disparaging manner" that she was just talking about. Geeze.
posted on February 19, 2002 05:24:11 PM new
You are right - I shouldn't have said the things about her car. Likewise, she shouldn't have left negative feedback about me - especially after I offered to send her jewelry back to her AND pay her check and listing fees. All I'm saying is that the fact that she wasn't paid wasn't because I didn't try. I knew that I couldn't afford the items with my husband unemployed. I offered to send them back WITH fees - then she's free to sell them again. End of story. She's the one that wanted to start the war.
Regarding the car - as I stated clearly, I was putting myself down on her level. You lose the ability to provide for your family and let someone make fun of it. Let them throw it in your face and then tell me you wouldn't be angry. Then let them post absolute blatent LIES about you and then you tell me that you wouldn't defend yourself. Honestly.
I admitted at least 9 times that it was MY fault for buying from her in the first place. What more do you want? I did try to pay for the auction with a GOOD check. As I said in my "saga" - the check was good when I wrote it. If I could have forseen the future, I never would have bid on it. The whole point to my "saga" was that a seller with "dark views of humanity" as SHE put it, might ought to think twice about being a seller, where she actually has to come into contact with the very people she hates.
She had the right to post lies about my transaction and all I did was straighten out the truth. I have written proof if anyone would like to see it. If she can post lies, then why can I not defend myself?? I did try to return the items (this was BEFORE she changed her return policy to suit her agenda) and as I stated perfectly clearly MANY TIMES - she would have been paid, but the strain of having little income for several months made things other than "Betty" a priority. Like electricity. Like water. Like insurance.
I never asked you to side with me - I was just exercising my right to defend myself. At least I told the truth. Hindsight is 20/20 everywhere. There's another seller on the board right now that is posting his miserable experience with a rude seller. Sure, he sees what he SHOULD have done, but that has nothing to do with the actual transaction.
My apologies for the car comment. You are right - the car shouldn't have been in this. The car didn't do anything wrong. I was making an example of something that was important to her and ridiculing it. Kind of like she did with me and my family.
posted on February 19, 2002 05:37:29 PM new
Hmmm. Think we will see bettylou come on here and admit some of the things she said and did wrong? BBBWAAAAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted on February 19, 2002 05:39:46 PM new
Gee, how'd this get back up to the top?
Oh. What's her name weighed in. Sorry, but I didn't read the whole sorry diatribe.
"The check was good when I wrote it."
That's odd; I heard that exact same phrase from yet another bad check writer, just today...along with the usual catalogue of excuses. After she had ignored my "nice" YCB email for 10 days.
Re: the charges of rudeness...
I am direct in my dealings. Some people appreciate that, others don't. Look at the number of positive feedbacks, then look at the number of positive *unique* feedbacks. I have many repeat customers. None of them have ever bounced a check in dealing with me.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: some people who write bad checks don't like having their nasty behavior pointed out to them. They lash out. They make ugly personal comments. They don't seem to be able to handle themselves in a businesslike manner. They reach and grasp and strain to try to justify what they have done. You were rude to me. You did not give me the respect I deserve. Sure, I took your items and gave you a bad check, but I am a customer and I deserve your respect. You're just a shopkeeper.
Well, sorry, I don't believe that cheats deserve respect. I have, I suppose, rather old-fashioned values in that I pay my bills. I *have* bounced a check or two in the past, and I'm sure not proud of it. I made an effort to improve my bookkeeping and the situation has not recurred. But it never occurred to me to blame the store where I wrote the check.
Betty, how long do you usually wait to ship? You have lots of comments of buyers waiting a month to get their items. Also, in your TOS it states that you can only get tracking with Express mail - what's wrong with using Priority mail w/delivery confirmation fortracking as a cheaper alternative?
1) We ship on receipt of payment. If you read this whole thread, you would know that. I stated it several times. We don't hold checks.
I think some people have experienced as much as a month between the time the auction ended and the day they got their item, but your characterization of the number as "lots" is not accurate.
Usually it's because they didn't send their payment for a couple weeks. Sometimes it's because they didn't put an auction number or an eBay userid on the payment, which means all we can do is send a postcard to the address on their check begging for information.
2) What's wrong with Priority mail with delivery confirmation? Nothing, probably, except that we choose not to do business that way. I'm not so impressed with either PM or DC, having shipped tens of thousands of packages over the last four years. I go with what is proven to have worked for me.
Look here, folks.
I am one of the VERY few eBay sellers who has revealed my eBay userid here, knowing full well that there are lots of folks reading AW who have nothing better to do than make snotty comments or create trouble for hardworking people they don't even know. I expect the nastiness; it seems to be in some peoples' nature.
But I'm not going to spend hours defending my business practices, or refuting point by point every statement made by a bad check writer who believe's she's been grievously wronged. Let such people bring legal action, if they can. They can certainly rant here all they want in the court of public opinion and apparently there are people willing to endlessly listen.
posted on February 19, 2002 05:59:17 PM new
"Well, sorry, I don't believe that cheats deserve respect. I have, I suppose, rather old-fashioned values in that I pay my bills. I *have* bounced a check or two in the past, and I'm sure not proud of it. I made an effort to improve my bookkeeping and the situation has not recurred. But it never occurred to me to blame the store where I wrote the check"
I never blamed the store that wrote the check. I merely corrected your lies and told my side of the story. May have been long, but at least I didn't whine for 8 pages. I'm so happy that whomever you wrote a bad check against let you make it right and didn't leave you negative feedback before even talking with you.
Please, by all means "bettylou" get back to your thousands of adoring fans. I merely defended what YOU put on here FIRST.
posted on February 19, 2002 06:20:53 PM new
bettylou, you have been willing to pontificate page after page after page as long as the opinion was in your favor. When some people think your problems were made much worse by your attitude and/or business practices, you plead business to take care of.
Oh, and before you ask or insinuate, I don't know either one of your buyers. I have approximately 800 positive feedback on Ebay with two negatives. Almost all of my feedback are from selling. I have developed an opinion by following this thread and listening to how talk about your customers.
Prior to Ebay, I owned an antique store in a historic area with a friend for 10 years. Now I do antique shows about twice a month. After seven days a week in a shop, year after year, you learn how to bend your rules and work with people that get themselves in a fix. I think your first buyer used poor judgment. Your second buyer was a victim of loss of income. If you treat every case differently, just like the circumstances and people are different, you bring a lot less headaches down on yourself. Most people are embarrassed by what they did and a little on the defensive. If you keep your cool most people will pay up quickly, and you have them off your books a lot faster.
posted on February 19, 2002 07:45:27 PM new
Bettylou: Ya know, I am beginning to think you do have a pretty dark view of the world.
I sell on eBay - I get an occasional slow payment, I've gotten a couple of NSF checks. I guess I could have gotten all pissy with the buyers about it, but I choose to be a schmuck and give people the benefit of doubt until I have good reason to get angry. One of the NSF checks that I got was the buyer's bank's fault...they even forwarded an e-mail from the bank admitting such (the bank credited a deposit to the buyer's savings account instead of their checking account). Mistakes DO happen that are beyond one's control sometimes.
Just because you had another buyer who sent ya a NSF check today that said the same thing BPwilson did, doesn't mean squat. I don't care how many times you hear an excuse - every once in a while the excuse will turn out to be the truth! Only BPwilson knows if she had the funds in her account when she wrote that check...hardly seems fair to judge everyone with the same broad brush.
I remember a long while ago on this very board that a seller got a very humbling experience....he got that old "my spouse died" excuse one too many times from a late payer, and ripped the buyer a new one. Buyer sends copy of obit. Ouch!
I know that people make up excuses all the time ...but people really do die, get hospitalized, etc. I bet that after Sept. 11 there were a few people who claimed to have lost someone in the towers -bet it was true in some cases. I'd not want to be the seller who got cranky about waiting, so I'm willing to take people at their word.
From Bettylou:
"Oh. What's her name weighed in. Sorry, but I didn't read the whole sorry diatribe."
I'm sorry, that just seems childish. If you didn't read it, seems silly to be commenting on it at all. Plus, you admit to having bounced checks yourself in the past. Did you get treated like pond scum when it happened?
bpwilson: Yep, I'm sure I'd be ticked off too. And yes, I would probably try to correct any misinformation that I thought had been written about me. But as hard as it is, ya gotta try and be factual and not get caught up in name-calling (Yep, I know its not easy!). I think it usually only makes you look bad when you stoop to the same level as someone who is trashing you. I DO hope things are going much better for you now.
posted on February 19, 2002 08:34:54 PM new
bpwilson -
Believe it or not, I actually read through the diatribe that you wrote. I have never read through a longer emotionally based argument in my life. As I finished, I said to myself, "sounds like a rough period of time, but so what?" WE ALL GO THROUGH ROUGH PERIODS. I depend on my auction sales to make a living, so does Betty.
I'll bet you've CURSED your husbands employer plenty in the past month, (remember - NO WARNING, just gone) yet you expect Betty to "UNDERSTAND" and see it your way. Same situation... Funny how you are incapable of seeing it through Betty's eyes... Obviously she depends on payments like yours to meet her bills.
we had exactly $62.00 in the bank. I went to the auto parts store and purchased a rebuilt water pump for $48.00, which left a whopping $14.00 in our bank account.
Well that small balance should have disappeared with the NSF fee. You're in Tennessee, Betty is in California and SHE notified you of the NSF check. Yeah right. BULL____ ! You neglected to even warn her it was coming back. With out of state banking, I'd bet it took a minimum of 10 business days for that check to get back. You expect us to believe that in those 10 days you didn't check your bank balance ONE time, or OPEN YOUR MAIL. Sure, I believe that. Yeah right.
but it is no one’s fault other than your own that you weren’t paid before now.
If you had any of my sympathies for your predicament you lost them here. It is TOTALLY and COMPLETELY your fault that she wasn't paid. Your attempt to push responsibility to her is ridiculous. simply and utterly ridiculous. Fact is that you tried to PUNISH HER by not paying a debt you owed. If not illegal it is definitely immoral. Sadly, you proved here that all the bad things Betty said about you are TRUE. YES, TRUE. You deserved everything she said about you.
The money was there when I wrote the check.
Who cares? The only thing that matters is that the money is there when the check is presented for payment. Who gives a damn about your intentions? Sooner or later your ACTIONS matter. Your actions SUCK. You punished someone because they were angry that you couldn't fulfill your responsibilities. You yelled at someone because they didn't understand your situation, yet you forget they have NO responsibility to do that if they choose not to. You didn't even have the DECENCY to warn her that your check was coming back. Pathetic, simply PATHETIC.
Take your sob story elsewhere. I empathize with your situation, I've been there, but for heavens sake, have some responsibility, have some respect for your fellow humans (they are important too) and for God's sake, judge yourself on your ACTIONS once in a while instead of your INTENTIONS. Your emotions have lied to you in this instance. You blew this one big time and deserved everything you got. She didn't OWE you understanding, she owed you JEWELRY and you got it. She got stiffed - BY YOU.
posted on February 19, 2002 08:55:16 PM new
I think something else has to be mentioned here. The jewelry bought from Betty appeared in aweebit's storefront even after she knew that the check had bounced. I think we all have sympathys for disasters that happen but all this could have been eliminated if only aweebit would have emailed Betty and said she didn't have enough funds in her checking account to cover the check.
In my TOS I state I take Personal Checks, which I do not hold. That means if you write a check it had better be in that account. Don't figure you have a week before I put the check in the bank so therefore you have a week to deposit the money. Wrong, if you have NO money in the account don't write the check...
posted on February 19, 2002 09:00:45 PM new
So Betty,
How does it feel to have someone put you and your life under the microscope? It was perfectly fine when you went on for 8 pages about me, bpwilson and others, but let us come here and defend ourselves and all of a sudden YOU have something better to do. Did you really think you could come here and make yourself out to be some kind of saint when the reality is that you seem to thrive on the misfortune of others? That is very, very sad.
As with bpwilson my checks were also good when I wrote them and sent them. As far as criminal behavior goes, yours is in the thick of it. Let me list Betty's criminal offenses for our faithful readers:
1. As bpwilson stated, threatening criminal action for a cival offense is in and of itself a crime. It is called EXTORTION.
2. Threatening to post bad press, sue, have someone arrested for such a defense in order to attain more monies than were owed you is BLACKMAIL.
3. Contacting ones family in a matter pertaining to this is called HARASSMENT.
4. Posting incorrect and defaming statements (particularly where you make then up as you go along to fit your agenda) in order to defame their character or ruin their business is called LIABLE and DEFAMATION OF CHARACTER.
You see what you wrote about us were lies and now that is coming to light. And like any cockroach, Betty has scurried away as soon as the light was turned on. Everything that bpwilson and myself have said about Betty is true. Betty, might I remind you that you STARTED this rant and have carried it for 8 pages with your damsel in distress routine. And now that we have told the truth YOU can't handle it. What...doesn't fit your agenda?
Betty, might I suggest the next time that you start your "scare tactics" that you situate yourself with the law first. If I were litigious, I'd hall your ass into court for all of the above. And what have you got? Payment, that's what you got. And still you are not satisfied. Still whining about it. "Oh woes me, I am having problems with NSF checks and bad customers". Did you ever think that EVERY sale is a good sale? That people are not all necessarily out to screw you and that stuff happens. But to take it to the extremes that you have is just psycho.
What's the matter BettyLou, did the truth scare off the bully?
You must really have low self eteem to have to make everyone else out to be so low and terrible in order to make yourself look better. Does it make you feel better to be in the spot light even if you had to lie to get there?
Betty, you haven't been honest since day one, and honestly, none of us are expecting it from you now.
LIBRA:
You must have missed the part where I explained why the check NSF'd. Another Ebayer had written me a bad check, so I totally know how it feels to go through this from the other side. This NSF caused several of my checks to NSF, causing a domino effect. I usually hold merchandise until the check clears, but it was Christmas and I wanted the merchandise to get there on time.
Unlike Betty, I worked it out with my buyer and they sent payment within 2 weeks with little drama. People are going through rough times and we all need to try and be compassionate and not judgemental.
Also bpwilson stated that she rec'd the merchandise late, offered to make payment, which Betty now has, and did everything in her power to rectify the situation. I did the same, but it is really difficult with someone who fights you the whole way.
I listed the items, 4 of them, not "a store full" as stated by Betty, after I had sent her a MO to cover all auctions and bank fees. Betty claims she never rec'd it and now I am tracing it, but there is a fee, so I am out that, as well as over $200 for a MO + additional monies I have paid to Betty for bank fees, etc. So you see, I had every right to believe the items were mine and that I could dispose of them as I wished. Afterall, I had only paid for them twice.
[ edited by AWeeBitOWhimsy on Feb 19, 2002 09:15 PM ]
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