posted on March 16, 2001 05:42:15 AM new
During the past couple of weeks I have noticed a marked decrease in the number of Bush bashing threads. Being a Republican, this has resulted in my suffering from the following :
1. My blood pressure has dropped to dangerously normal levels.
2. My hair has stopped falling out which has resulted in more frequent trips to the barber. This costs me money!
3. I am able to sleep at night which has forced me to stop my 3am eBay listings. Now my sales are dropping.
4. I have stopped snapping at my wife which has put an end to "make up romance".
Please people, show some compassion! Step across the aisle and give a hand to the other side. Let's see more DUMBYA threads. I WANT MY OLD LIFE BACK!
posted on March 16, 2001 08:06:38 AM new
I don't know who makes decisions in Washington, but I'll sure bet it isn't the person who prostituted themselves so much over the course of their political career in order to BE president that they are no longer recognizable as humans. Most of the last presidents we've had have been told what to say, what to wear, when to smile, where to go and what to do. You can tell when they're trying to ad-lib something, because that's when you realize they can't put two words together in a coherent sentence. Bush Jr is particularly obvious about it. Clinton looked good in front of a camera, so they turned their backs on his little indescretions because it kept him happy. Reagan was senile long before he won his second election. My dog is probably more capable of running a country than Reagan was.
Call my cynical if you want, but does anyone actually believe there is any resemblance between the strong, compassionate presidents portrayed in movies and on tv, and the ventriliquist dummies we get now? Does anyone really believe our beloved president is allowed to make ANY decisions other than which shoe to put on first in the morning?
posted on March 16, 2001 08:20:12 AM new
With the Bush presidency the economy has thoroughly tanked, incipient workplace protections for repetitive motion injuries have been nixed, international friends and foes have been insulted and offended, and we're about to have bankruptcy protections for individuals and small businesses vastly curtailed (big ones unharmed). I guess he's proving efficient and effective at driving the country into the ground "to the glory of god".
Congradulations, it looks like he will do plenty more harm in the years ahead.
posted on March 16, 2001 09:21:56 AM new
How can Bush be responsible for the tanking economy when the economy has been in the tank for about 10-12 months now? Gee.... who was president this time last year? OH YEAH! CLINTON!
posted on March 16, 2001 09:48:29 AM new
Thanks so much everyone. I'm starting to feel like my old self already! A special thanks to Figmente for the "Bush tanking the economy" remark. I think I lost a clump of hair with that sentence alone!
posted on March 16, 2001 10:25:34 AM new
Well, here's something that made me giggle this morning. The "lead photo" on my Yahoo page shows Bush with what looks like a gap-toothed grin:
The larger version of the photo looks normal:
Could that be a bit of mischief by Democratic web folks at Yahoo?
posted on March 16, 2001 10:36:02 AM new
rainybear, he does have that 'Alfred E. Neuman' look in that photo, heh heh! Anyone know what the cute scottie's name is?
posted on March 16, 2001 11:51:56 AM new
I think that eyeguy6 is right: we have chased away most republicans from this forum. The few to dare get in a crack sidewise get inudated with "oh, yeah? Lookit THIS . . ." from the other posters in here.
But this normal Evolution!
I've been ranting and railing against the Stupidity of the far-right conservatives on many boards for nearly a decade -- and it's always the same:
a) The republicans congregate somewhere that intelligent progressive people are not, sit around, and make crude anti-Liberal jokes all day.
b) This activity attracts the attention of the Liberals on that board: after all, the conservatives never have a leg to stand on, so it's lotsa fun to point out just how stupid and nasty their political representatives really are.
c) One Liberal tells another Liberal, and so more progressive-types join in the fray; much like sharks at a feeding frensy with conservatives as bait.
d) After ripping even die-hard conservatives any number of new rectums, they abdicate and find somewhere else that Liberals aren't so that they can tell crude jokes again.
This cycle repreats itself indefintely.
BUT, if you want them back, you have to treat them like an endangered species:
a) Limited Hunting Licenes: you can only kill the interests of conservatives with just so many hard facts. Then your turn is over and you have to let the field lie fallow for a season.
b) Stop jumping on every conservative: go after the ones that tell the weirdest stories or repeat the inane explanations that come out from the republican press corps. Remember: if you fish them out of the water before spawning season, there won't be any new ones next time.
c) Restock the Pond. Every once in a while, try to AGREE with something that they say. Yes, the stupid, arrogant, unbelievable things that they say make you want to scream and pull out your hair, but . . . it's for the good of the board. This will help keep the conservative population alive and it will attract the attention of other conservatives.
If you pledge to do these three things, we can keep our conservatives in sufficient quantity to have our good laughs everyday! It wojn't be the outrageous joy and belly-busters that we're used to; but it's better than nothing.
posted on March 16, 2001 12:41:43 PM new
George W. Bush was thrilled at finally being able to spend his first night in the White House, but something very strange happened.
On the very first night, he was awakened by George Washington's ghost. Bush asked the ghost, "President Washington, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?"
"Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did," advised Washington.
With all the excitement of the White House, Bush still couldn't sleep well, and then, later on that night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson moved through the dark bedroom "Tom, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" Bush asked.
"Cut taxes and reduce the size of the government," Jefferson answered.
Bush still couldn't sleep well, so much later, on the same night he saw another ghostly figure moving in the shadows. It was Abraham Lincoln's ghost.
"Abe, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" Bush asked.
posted on March 16, 2001 02:16:15 PM new
eyeguy: The bleeding heart liberal in me just can't sit by and watch your health and happiness ruined!! So, just for you: (this may have been posted before, just showed up in my mailbox today):
Bit of humor from our president (actual quotes).
"The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country."
....George W. Bush, Jr.
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in
our air and water that are doing it."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
....George W. Bush, Jr.
"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and
child."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"Welcome to Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"Mars is essentially in the same orbit...Mars is somewhat the same
distance
from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there
are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is
oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 8/11/94
"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this
century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this
century."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 9/15/95
"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and
democracy
but that could change."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 5/22/98
"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that
one
word is 'to be prepared'."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 12/6/93
"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 11/30/96
"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the
future."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"The future will be better tomorrow."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"We're going to have the best educated American people in the world."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 9/21/97
"People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and
have
a tremendous impact on history."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr. to Sam Donaldson, 8/17/93
"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm
commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"Public speaking is very easy."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr. to reporters in 10/9
"I am not part of the problem. I am a Republican"
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr
"When I have been asked who caused the riots and the killing in LA, my
answer has been direct & simple: Who is to blame for the riots? The
rioters
are to blame. Who is to blame for the killings? The killers are to blame.
....George W. Bush, Jr.
"Illegitimacy is something we should talk about interms of not having it."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 5/20/96
"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 9/22/97
"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 9/5/93
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr., 9/18/95
"The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that George
Bush may or may not make."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the
mistakes we may or may not have made."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solarsystem."
....Governor George W. Bush, Jr.
posted on March 16, 2001 03:25:19 PM new
Bless your hearts for taking pity on this poor dumb Republican. I do tend to lean more towards the middle than the right so maybe I'm just partially stupid!
posted on March 16, 2001 05:03:24 PM newlotsafuzz:
I'm sorry to be the one to tell you that your e-mail is wrong. Many of those quotes come from The Complete Collection of Dan Quaylisms. While some are certainly from Pres. Bush, jr. it would be a shame to attribute all of them to His Ineptness.
I also wanted to say that two days before the election, Gov. Bush quipped to an elderly group in Florida: [i]"It's a shame that elderly citizens have to make a choice between paying for drugs and medicine." (he meant between FOOD and medicine = goes to show you that being hopped up on uppers isn't all that it's cracked up to be).
