RM
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posted on November 4, 2000 07:56:43 PM
Help! The high bidder on my auction is on my front lawn!!! Six other bidders are trying to steal my car!!! My home has been invaded by shillers that were sent by Safe Harbor!!! My contact info was pulled by white slavers!!!!! There are alien beings inside my computer using eBay’s watch feature to stalk me!!!! My email address is available to everyone ……………….customers might be able to contact me!!!!!!!! All my auctions were canceled just because I sell illegal items and shill them to boot!!!!!! HELP, I’ve been reinstated by eBay!!!!!! How come I have to give eBay my actual identity? Shouldn’t I have the same right to anonymity as any other criminal???!!!! Private detectives from eBay are sending me naked pictures of themselves!!!! HELP, all my non paying bidders are chipping in to actually pay for something!!!!!
Did I forget anything?
Ray
[ edited by RM on Nov 4, 2000 08:26 PM ]
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magazine_guy
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:03:08 PM
Bad day, Ray? 
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RM
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:05:34 PM

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Shadowcat
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:10:08 PM
You forgot that someone stole the pics of your used panties auctions, even though you'd written "THIS SELLER CHEWS HIS TOENAILS" across the front...
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isworeiwouldneverdothis
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:10:51 PM
"Private detectives from eBay are sending me naked pictures of themselves!!!!"
Ray, you are blessed. Simply blessed.
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CAgrrl
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:11:54 PM
don't forget THE SKY IS FALLING!!!!
ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!
Some days this forum does seem like that huh?
(My boyfriend's in Santa Barbara & I wish I were with him, but at least I'm gettin' some giggles in the message center... )
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CAgrrl
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:13:08 PM
good one Shadowcat!! 
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toyranch-07
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:15:33 PM
How about "Meg had to sell her stock to become an 'Angel Investor' in usedpantyauction.com, which is why she banned them from ebaY."
http://www.millionauctionmarch.com/
[email protected]
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radh
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:22:26 PM
Dontcha worRy, Ray, I'm fueling up my Black Helicopter right noW, and mY Men in Black will skeeeR theM ol' meanies awaY!
toyranch: have YOU reserved that domain?
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Shadowcat
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:34:30 PM
...and all your deadbeats decided to throw you a party-but they didn't pay for the food...
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RM
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:34:30 PM
Help! My high bidder just showed up at my place of employment and applied for my job!! He's been feeding my dog chunks of steak and I saw him looking at my wife. My friends all like him and even my kids think he's cool. Should I give him a neg or just a neutral?
Ray (LOL at what you folks are coming up with) 
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Shadowcat
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posted on November 4, 2000 08:36:49 PM
Whoa! Look at the times on our posts!
...and you tried to sell your soul but not even Satan met your reserve of $1.00...
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barkrock
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posted on November 4, 2000 09:56:48 PM
I think we need to work Paypal into this thread; along with the Russian mafia, cheap burial urns, family "hierloons", Bulgaria, trailer parks, trolls, the soul of some has-been folks singer named Jeff, genuine tortoise shell, and rare vintage underwear.
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Powerhouse
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posted on November 4, 2000 10:10:11 PM
And anything to do with feces...
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barkrock
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posted on November 4, 2000 10:21:14 PM
ah, yes...that goes nicely with the vintage UW, doncha think?
Also included should be pink curtains, keyword spamming, Rosie, damaged televisions and dolls, grocery lists, dead relatives who are suddenly hospitalized, unidentifiable whatsis, over/under packaging, and the IRS.
Geez, I'm starting to sound like a soundbite encapsulation of AW. Now where's RM who is supposed to be using all this good material for continuing this saga?
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ksterni
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posted on November 4, 2000 10:28:28 PM
You forgot to say that all the payments on auctions you won were LOST IN THE MAIL! Bummer!
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ksterni
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posted on November 4, 2000 10:30:20 PM
Ya know, I'm sure JERRY12 can relate to this! Where is that DUDE when we need him????
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Crystalline_Sliver
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posted on November 5, 2000 12:28:18 AM
Ya forgot Kidney Auctions and Jeff Buckley's mom.
:\\\"Crystalline Sliver cannot be the target of spells or abilities.
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uaru
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posted on November 5, 2000 01:19:11 AM
There is a superstition that if you play a country western song backwards your wife comes back, your dog is raised from the dead, and they return your repossessed trailer. Not sure if it has any effect on eBay related problems, but it might not hurt to try. I've thought about trying it myself, I miss my dog and trailer, but the thought of my wife coming back... shudder.
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HJW
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posted on November 5, 2000 05:23:01 AM
uaru,
substitute the word "wife" with "husband" and I'll say amen!
But that's just small stuff. Right now, I'm really scared. There is
a detective agency after me and my loved ones!!! Help me!!!
Helen
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macandjan
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posted on November 5, 2000 05:23:32 AM
[ edited by macandjan on Dec 3, 2000 03:55 PM ]
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HJW
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posted on November 5, 2000 05:25:39 AM
And somebody is trying to get into my ports!
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macandjan
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posted on November 5, 2000 06:47:38 AM
[ edited by macandjan on Dec 3, 2000 03:56 PM ]
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reston_ray
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posted on November 5, 2000 07:00:22 AM
These happenings are all a natural outcome of H*ll freezing over.
Confirmation that this has occured can be seen on any site page by noting It's logo is now coated with ice crystals.
Ray - I've been meaning to ask. Were you the one bragging a couple of months ago about the great deal you got on a "lifetime" subscription to the eBay Magazine?
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brighid868
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posted on November 5, 2000 08:03:10 AM
Trolls invaded my home last night and redecorated it in "Shabby Chic" while I slept!
Where is Martha Stewart? She needs her own 911 line! Probably pruning the holly bushes again so they'll fall in perfectly formed clusters just in time for Christmas.
Help!
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zapped101
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posted on November 5, 2000 08:33:53 AM
This is the kind of stuff that really bothers me here isbn't there a rule against this?
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RM
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posted on November 5, 2000 08:35:18 AM
HELP! Jeff Buckley's mom just came to my house and tried to sell me some of Ross's art work!!!! What should I do????
HELP! Somebody key word spammed me and I can't get up!!!!
HELP! I was the high bidder on a broken glass auction and it arrived today in one piece!!! What can I do?????
HELP!!! The used panties I bought arrived today and they actually were cleaned per eBay's rules!!! What recourse do I have????
Ray
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RM
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posted on November 5, 2000 08:36:56 AM
HELP!! Isn't there a rule against my being forced to read this???!!!!
Ray
[ edited by RM on Nov 5, 2000 08:39 AM ]
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HJW
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posted on November 5, 2000 08:46:58 AM
Seriously,
There does seem to be a massive proliferation of nonsense posts
on Auction Watch lately.
Now, if we could encourage some PayPal "engineers" and "product
developers" to go to work for Ebay, we would have some serious topics
to discuss.
Helen
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RM
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posted on November 5, 2000 09:02:04 AM
HELP!! I'm an eBay employee posting here under a false I.D. trying to lobby support for the next new feature that I've helped dream up!!!!Is it working????
Ray
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