posted on April 6, 2001 03:56:52 PM
No, really! Everything is just fine and dandy with eBay, and anything you can't deal with is therefore your own problem. I mean, I'm certainly not having any problems, so it MUST be you, right? Bothered by all the new and increased fees? Well, that's your problem -- deal with it. Finding it harder to make a profit on eBay the way you used to? Again, it's your problem, so deal with it. Too many sellers gouging with inflated "handling" charges? Heck, they're perfectly happy so why aren't you? Deal with it. Too many deadbeat bidders? Once again, I have to point out that it's your problem, not eBay's. Don't like reserve auctions? Who cares, your problem, deal with it. Hate snipers? Have I mentioned that it's your problem? Well it is, so deal it with. Don't like the way eBay forces you to jump through hoops to get a FVF refund? Let me just point out that the key words here are "don't like" and that it is therefore, you guessed, your problem. So deal with it.
You don't agree with me that everything is wonderful? Well, wah wah wah. Want some cheese with that whine? I'm doing just fine, thank you very much, so anybody who has a complaint or a "pet peeve" is either just imagining it or is just a crybaby. And I'll be sure to remind you of that fact every time you feel like complaining until you stop it.
Remember -- the official rules of the eBay Outlook state that no negativity is allowed here whatsoever [unless, of course, it is directed at other members]. In fact, this message board was created for the sole intent of giving folks a place to praise eBay [unlike the official eBay message boards where people just complain all the time]. But even if that weren't the case, the fact still remains that I'm not having any problems and therefore neither are you [or at least no problems worth mentioning].
Oh, and do you really hate how some people have to put down, disparage and otherwise belittle anybody who complains about eBay? Well, guess what?
It's your problem.
Deal with it.
This message of holiday cheer was made possible by the "Everything is Wonderful" police, whose official motto is "If we're not having problems then neither are you, so get over it", with a generous grant by the wonderful people at the We're Always Right Corporation.
posted on April 6, 2001 05:20:34 PM
Dear god: I couldn't agree with you more.
Mind, I had a small relapse this morning and posted my latest vintage whine, but I didn't mean it, really I didn't.
eBay is the most wonderful site in the whole www. People who think otherwise should stick their heads in toilet bowls and flush at least three times, thereby clearing away any negative thoughts as they struggle to keep their noses from being sucked down the pipes.
Henceforth and forthwith I shall crawl on my knees to Honolulu to make atonement for my sins committed earlier today.
Viva eBay! WE ALL LOVE YOU!!!!!
repeat 40 times and publish in all the major newspapers and eBay will be kind to you!
