posted on February 14, 2002 10:55:13 PM
Hi everyone. I would greatly appreciate any and all feedback, good, bad or neutral as well as any and all advice on how to procede. I am so frustrated with this buyer and I just don't know what to do anymore. Here is the Readers Digest version of the Sunday Night Miniseries.
I had up for auction a black velvet evening dress. It was used and I only wore it a few times and I thought it was in good condition. The only flaw I saw was the slit. It's a full length gown, so the slit comes up to just above the knee area. It had become seperated at the seam where the manufacturer had sewn it. There was no fabric damage, so I know it could be fixed. It also needed a good cleaning. It had been hanging in my closet for 2 years (in a drycleaner plastic cover) so I know it could have used a freshing. I stated everything I just typed above in the auction verbage. I also included a small velvet evening purse and a white brazzier in the auction. Auction ended 9/26 (yep, that long ago). Buyer paid via paypal instant transfer. As I was packing the dress up, I found a pair of black satin elbow length gloves (dress was sleeveless) and included them as a bonus in the package. I shipped it off and thought she got herself a great deal. The dress cost me $125 4 years ago and the other accesories were another $60 or so and her high bid was $25 with $6 shipping. Not too bad. And, it was out of my closet
She emailed me after she got the dress saying she was taking it to the seamstress to get the slit fixed. Total for that was $30. She then emailed that she was taking it to the dry cleaner and that was going to cost her $15. She got the dress back from the dry cleaners and they told her there was some damage on the dress, what appeared to be a cigarette burn just above the thigh area. I don't smoke, so I couldn't imagine where the cigarette burn had come from, but thought I may have missed it (it's a possibility) in my looking over the dress. This whole process took a month, 10/6. She said she was going to take it to another cleaner that might be able to repair the dress and she would get back to me.
Her next email was on 11/8 and she said the second cleaner told her it was unfixable. At that point, she asked for a refund. I told her sure, just send everything back, and I will refund the money via paypal. She emailed back and said she would try to get to the PO that day (11/8) to mail back.
Next email is on 11/15 telling me she hadn't mailed it back yet and she wanted to know, since she had put so much money into the dress already if she could keep the accessories. I felt bad (somewhat leary, too) but agreed. If she had spent $45, I thought keeping the accessories would be fair. I asked her to tell me where to look for the damage so I could be sure to look in the right place when I got it back.
Next email was on 12/5 saying she had finally mailed out the dress and where to look for the damage. I got the dress back 12/10. Now, this next part is my fault because I didn't get back to her right away. I was so busy with holiday stuff, the dress sat there and I didn't do anything with it until 2 days after Christmas during which time she didn't email either. I figured with the holidays we were both busy. I emailed her 12/27 asking again for detailed information on the damage because I just couldn't see anything wrong with the dress. My family and I went on vacation for the New Year and I told her this in the email that I would be gone from 12/29 to 1/7, however I would have access to a computer and could reply to any emails she would send. During this time, there were no emails from her.
I sent her an email again on 1/9 asking for more details on the damage because I just could not see it. She emailed back that it was right on the front of the dress, as clear as day. I emailed her back and let her know that I was taking it to several cleaners to get them to look at it since I was unable to see anything.
I emailed her on 1/18 and told her that I had asked the cleaners to look at the dress to see if there was any damage at all anywhere. All 3 said no damage, but there were a few spots towards the bottom ankle area that looked like they needed to be cleaned, but no damage. I asked all 3 if there was any cigarette burns or anything else and they said no. At this point, I told her there were 2 options. I could either send her the dress back and she could either sell it or keep it or she could return the other accessories and I would refund her money minus any ebay fees since everything had taken so long that I could no longer file for a refund of the fees. I also asked her if she could think of any other alternate ideas and that I would be happy to take them into consideration.
She emailed 1/23 asking for my address to return the additional items. I could tell from the tone of the email that she was not happy about this and she was frustrated since her cleaners had told her the dress was non-repairable. I understood the upset, but I didn't want to feel like *I* had been taken to the cleaners in the process either. I emailed her 1/24 with my mailing adress.
I get an email today, 2/14 from her that says I leave her no other option but to file a complaint with ebay. She is upset that she had to pay over $40 for the repair and cleaning of this dress and then she had to send it back, which she also paid for return shipping. She had wanted the dress, but was disappointed with what her cleaners were telling her and had hoped to keep the gloves and purse (no mention of the brazzier) to try and recover some of the money she had already spent. She is also upset that I will be deducting the ebay fees from her refund.
Ok, now that you have read (hopfully I didn't bore you to sleep) the story, here are my questions.
1) Should I refund her money? If so, should I deduct ebay fees? I stated in the auction that the slit in the dress needed to be repaired. Should I be heald liable for those fees? I don't see any damage nor do my local cleaners as far as a cigarette burn or any other non-repairable damage.
2) Should I just send the dress back, which I offered to do anyway? If so, how do I tactfully tell her that this is the what I am doing?
3) Should I be concerned about her complaint to ebay? Hasn't it been too long for them to do anything? The auction isn't even online anymore, it says "Invalid Item" when i try to pull it up.
4) What alternatives are there?
5) What don't I know that I don't know? In other words, is there an aspect of this that I haven't even thought about?
I'm sorry to be so long winded in this, but I'm just exasperated at this transaction! So, I thought I would turn to all of you experts out there to see what the concensus is. I really would appreciate any suggestions on how to move forward with this.
posted on February 14, 2002 11:16:23 PM
I'm convinced that big 'messes' like this should be PLANNED FOR AHEAD OF TIME by having a clearly stated RETURNS&REFUNDS POLICY stated in every auction from the beginning!
You should have just insisted on return of EVERYTHING at the start & refunded her then.
Personally, taking the dress all over the place was counter-productive...it just got YOU upset & HER defensive.
This may be one of those times when feeBay's in-house SCAM-MEISTER (SquareTrade) might actually be of some benefit -- by involving an "impartial" third-party, you might be able to wiggle out of this one without too much loss of face for either of yowse!
posted on February 14, 2002 11:18:21 PM
I think once she altered the dress (repaired and cleaned) that removed any obligation on your part to give a refund. My advice is if you deal in this sort of thing, change your terms of service so that there are x number of days they have to return, and it must be in the same condition as you sent it. How much she spent trying to get it like she wanted is not relevant here.
I would let her keep the dress (and not refund) or give a refund, but not for any fees she incurred. I don't think it is reasonable for you to deduct the ebay fees on this transaction, normally you could get them back, but this went on too long to get them back.
posted on February 14, 2002 11:20:11 PM
I would tell her when you get everything back you will refund her $25.00 winnering bid. BUT not until the items are returned in the same condition as they were sent to her. IF you want to be super nice return her the $31.00.
My guess, she were it to the event she needed it for and then was done with it.
If and when she returns all the items, send her her money and move on.
Let her report it to ebay. Unless you have many many problem bidders, they will not do anything at all.
If she wants the dress back again, she needs to pay shipping.
Do you state a return policy? Did she ask about one before the auction ended?
Too much time has past already for her to do anything.
I have had over 5000 clothing auctions. Once I sold a silk blazer, lady said it had spots and she would try anything to get them out. Took it to the cleaners, woollite etc. Within 2 weeks and an email daily on what her next move was I received it back. I refunded her and thanked her. It was over!
You are talking about 4 1/2 MONTHS! Send the final email saying return all within 10 days (or whatever BUT give a date) in same condition, name the items you expect back, in 10 days. Block her from bidding again, and MOVE ON!
posted on February 14, 2002 11:28:30 PM
I would send the dress back. Block her from bidding on your auctions and move on. I wouldn't lose any sleep over it. How do you know she might have worn the dress and now it is of no use to her. Many things have happened and this has gone on to long anyway. Send the dress back and forget it.
posted on February 15, 2002 05:07:04 AM
I agree with Libra. Send the dress back. Sounds like she is trying to pull the wool over your eyes. She probably planned to wear it over the holidays and set up her little scam before that. Its been too long for a refund. Maybe include a note when you send the dress back.
MEOW
posted on February 15, 2002 06:37:32 AM
I would not send the dress back!! I would tell her to send everything back-refund the entire 31.00 and move on. I agree she probably wanted to wear this over the holidays and was running a scam. I don't believe she was told the dress was damaged-she probably had it cleaned and wore it-now whe wants to return it. From now on be specific in your auctions concerning returns-you'll get hassled less. Don't fool around with this one anymore-you won't win. Block her from bidders list and move on. I would make it very clear that ALL items must be returned prior to returning any funds.
posted on February 15, 2002 02:27:09 PM
I agree with capolady. Send "buyer" the $31 and move on. Let her keep the accessories -- you threw them in for free anyway. This is the only way to make all the hassle go away.
As sellers sometimes we just have to take our lumps. It's just part of doing business.
posted on February 15, 2002 02:45:57 PM
I'd send her a refund and let her keep the accessories. Then I'd list the dress on eBay again. With proms coming up and because the dress has been repaired, maybe it will get higher bids this time around.
posted on February 15, 2002 04:01:04 PM
RainyBear, the only thing this buyer should get is her dress back. why should she get a refund and get to keep accessories? she is just looking for a freebie. she wore the dress to her function and now wants her money back.
posted on February 15, 2002 06:07:58 PM
rarriffle - in principle I completely agree with you, but sometimes it's just easier to wrap things up with a painful situation and move on. If potsticka could get more for the dress the second time around (which of course isn't guaranteed) it would be both easier and more profitable to keep the dress and consider the accessories an exchange for the repairs.
It's just what I'd do in that situation, not what's ideologically correct. I like to avoid messy, drawn-out situations!
posted on February 16, 2002 01:01:10 AM
Hi everyone,
Thank you so much for all your feedback and suggestions. I appreciate your time.
I have been selling on ebay for almost 4 years and this is my first really stressful and certainly my longest problem. I have messed up in the past and (red faced) sent a refund or have been nice and given a refund if I think the buyer is being honest in what ever happened on their side. This one has just taken way too long and I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one that seems to think she used it for whatever purpose and is now trying to get her money back. However, I will certainly take into serious consideration of putting a refund policy in my auction verbage after what has happened. I just don't like the fact that my TOS might be longer than my wordy descriptions of the clothing being bought!
The gloves were the only freebie in this case. The evening purse and brazzier were listed in the auction verbage as part of the auction.
I will email her again and reiterate the original options and see what she would like to do. I don't mind paying to ship the dress back and I will let her know that I will refund her full bid and not deduct any ebay fees. I will also put a time limit on this and tell her that I need a reply by Monday (it is the weekend and she might be leaving since Monday is a holiday) as to her decision. If she chooses to have the dress shipped back, I will cover the shipping and ship out Tuesday. If she wants a return, then I would need to have the other items returned to me within 10 days (that's the amount of time I have listed in my auctions for payments to reach me) and I will propmtly issue a refund upon receipt.
Does anyone see anything I am missing or any other suggestions?
Thank you again for all the input. I will mark this one up as a learning experience. 1
