marwin
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posted on July 29, 2000 02:45:01 PM new
The purpose of the letters in our alphabet is to translate sounds into visual symbols.
"A" does this job very well. When we see this little sign, A, we know that it stands for the "A" sound.
No problem there.
Likewise, "B" or "D" tell us how we are to start the pronounciation of a sound. When we see "BA" we know the sound starts differently than in "DA". "BA" and "DA" are clearly different.
Since we use a limited number of sounds and we start sounds in a limited number of ways, naturally we only need so many letters, to express all of them.
One would think that by now, since we have been using an alphabet for a few thousand years, that we would have perfected a clear, precise and efficient alphabet.
Well, we don't, and here are some suggestions to improve the current vastly imperfect and confusing alphabet we use daily:
For starters let's look at C.
Sometimes C is used instead of S and sometimes instead of K. As in CEILING and as in CASE.
We have K and we have S. We don't need a letter which is sometimes one and sometimes the other.
I say, let's get rid of C. It's useless and confusing.
We can replace all Cs with either Ks or S'.
Amerika. Kanada. Kake. Kase. Seiling. Senter. Sigarettes. Seltic. Selibacy. etc.
Next, what about Q?
It is used like K. Let's get rid of it. We don't need it.
Having to add a U makes it even more cumbersome. Instead of Quebec for instance, under the new improved system it will become KEBEK.
Anyone has a problem with KEBEK?
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snowyegret
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posted on July 29, 2000 03:05:45 PM new
Marwin,
ROFLAMAO! I don't, but the thought of the quebecois huked on foniks. A bas L'Academie!
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krs
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posted on July 29, 2000 03:19:04 PM new
SHINA?
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krs
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posted on July 29, 2000 03:20:25 PM new
KNINA?
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krs
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posted on July 29, 2000 03:20:53 PM new
So much for that.
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toomanycomics
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posted on July 29, 2000 07:24:35 PM new
B...C...D...E...Z...
they sound alike to me....
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marwin
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posted on July 29, 2000 07:43:46 PM new
snowyegret: lol! Indeed the Kebekwa would be a great test market for the new, compact, alphabet!
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marwin
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posted on July 29, 2000 07:45:33 PM new
krs: You may want to add a T, when you want a T start...Tshina!
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krs
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posted on July 29, 2000 08:41:37 PM new
They have that, sortof, it's tsi, pronounced as 'sing taw' for Tsing Tao. No 'choo choo' in 'soo soo'. Not in 'koo koo' either, and king won't cause anyone to sing in China even on the train.
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snowyegret
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:24:07 PM new
No more shabby chic! A little lanyap (lagniappe) for that one, Marwin! 
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marwin
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:28:03 PM new
snowyegret: You must be from Louisiana!
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pareau
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:34:10 PM new
Wouldn't that be Loozeana?
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marwin
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:37:48 PM new
pareau: Yes, positively! Ding! One for Pareau!
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snowyegret
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:44:53 PM new
No, but I did misspend some time there.
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pareau
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:46:02 PM new
I got a ding.
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mybiddness
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:48:40 PM new
No ding for Pareau
It's Looweeeeezeeana!
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snowyegret
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:52:02 PM new
Teksas.
Pareau: You would be Paro, no?
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mybiddness
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posted on July 29, 2000 10:53:47 PM new
No ding for you either. Snowyegrat
It's Tex -$a$$.
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mybiddness
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posted on July 29, 2000 11:00:05 PM new
It occurs to me, I've overstepped my rights here. Marwin I concede to you as the official dinger giver outer. Who am I to withhold dings when they may be rightfully due... 
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snowyegret
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posted on July 29, 2000 11:01:12 PM new
How about in Spanish?
Tehas? Worthy of a ding?
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mybiddness
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posted on July 29, 2000 11:03:30 PM new
In accordance with newly stated policy of mybigmouth - I mean mybiddness, we will await Marwin's final decision as to dingworthiness.
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marwin
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posted on July 29, 2000 11:04:30 PM new
mybiddness: I herewith relinquish all my hereditary Ding rights. Be it that from this day onwards you may all bestow and withold Dings as you may see fit!
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mybiddness
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posted on July 29, 2000 11:07:17 PM new
Yeah! In that case, free dings for everyone!
Ding!
Ding!
Ding!
Ding!
Well thanks! That was fun!
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Antiquary
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posted on July 29, 2000 11:10:06 PM new
I think his one has the most votes for dingy thread of the evening.
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pareau
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posted on July 29, 2000 11:48:44 PM new
This is quite a night. We get a shot at blowing up a bridge and that gets zapped. I get a ding, and it gets yanked. Sure, now mybiddness is passing out dings to everybody, but they're not special MARWIN dings like I got before. Plus I think I wound up with a pre-owned ding this time and would prefer my original Marwin ding. The one with MY TEETH MARKS in it.
Thanks in advance for your assistance.
- Pareau
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