posted on March 31, 2006 09:07:25 AM
( That was the actual AP headline)
Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her in-laws and while visiting, she went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head.
One customer who been at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes were now open, and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she'd been shot in the back of the head, and had been holding her brains in for over an hour.
The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head. When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head.
When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and came to her aid.
Linda is a blonde, but I'm certain that's not relevant.
"“More Iraqis think things are going well in Iraq than Americans do. I guess they don’t get the New York Times over there.”—Jay Leno".
posted on March 31, 2006 10:28:48 AM
LOL!!! Anyone that stupid should have their license pulled.
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Never ask what sort if computer a guy drives. If he's a Mac user, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him? - Tom Clancy
[ edited by fenix03 on Mar 31, 2006 10:29 AM ]
posted on March 31, 2006 02:14:58 PM
Apt for this quote - "No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power." - P.J. O'Rourke
posted on March 31, 2006 05:56:01 PM
Dbl, you should really consider buying a dog. You obviously need someone to play with.
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Never ask what sort if computer a guy drives. If he's a Mac user, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him? - Tom Clancy
posted on April 1, 2006 05:50:17 AMDbl, you should really consider buying a dog. You obviously need someone to play with.
and you fenidixless should get a life of your own to own - instead of riding everybody coat tails this side of the atlantictthat is in somebox (the tx box, the internetbox,the ipod box...the anything you can fill yourself up with box) Obvious thing about you is you think youre smart...but youre not really that smart!..and you PI...I have to tie garlic around my neck to keep your blood suckjing cheater nosyazz butt away from me. Or perhaps I send a jombie on your azz that you never forget? smiles smoochies
posted on April 1, 2006 06:22:18 AM
Is there some particular reason that, as a woman, you think I would be insulted by you calling me dickless? .......... Sad. Truly sad.
And Dbl - as someone that devotes a frightning amount of time trying to pick fights using nonsense and babble, I don't quite think you are the one that should be giving advice to others.
Go find a pretty rock or something to play with. The adults are busy.
Bye Bye
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Never ask what sort if computer a guy drives. If he's a Mac user, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him? - Tom Clancy
posted on April 1, 2006 07:53:04 AMI don't quite think you are the one that should be giving advice to others.
yeah I be should a 4"9 sized 10 footed clown like you.
See you fenix...you lesbodickless freak, you aint nothing but an abused child and I dont want to have one pityful thing to do with you!
Go find a pretty rock or something to play with. The adults are busy.
Go punch somebody with your stereo boxed in addicted life. You freakazz little kid, with no life but what is wired and pumped into you....youre disgusting.
posted on April 1, 2006 07:59:01 AM
::I dont want to have one pityful thing to do with you!::
Then stop begging for my attention. Obviously you want something to do with me Dbl - you go out of your way to try to get my attention on a regular basis. It's pretty hard to sell your story when you hang on to everything I say, store it in your memory banks and bring it up in attempt to start a fight whenever you are not getting enough attention.
You are as transparent as you are pathetic.
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Never ask what sort if computer a guy drives. If he's a Mac user, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him? - Tom Clancy
[ edited by fenix03 on Apr 1, 2006 08:11 AM ]
posted on April 1, 2006 11:23:22 AM
Over the past few weeks, I've learned to look past Miss Dblf's chauvinistic self-fulfilling prophecies. I've learned to look past some of the unforgiving things Dblf has said. I've even learned to look past her attempts to set the wolf to mind the sheep. But I cannot stay silent about Dblf's incomprehensible and unforgivable audacity regarding a specific event that recently occurred. Let me start by stressing that I am not attempting to suppress anyone's opinions, nor do I intend to demean Dblf personally for her beliefs or worldviews. But I do claim that I must subject Dblf's allegations to the rigorous scrutiny they warrant.
Given the range and unpredictability of human behavior, it is quite possible that Dblf claims that there is an international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids. Well, I beg to differ. My intention here is not just to stand uncompromised in a world that's on the brink of Dblf-induced disaster, but also to expand people's understanding of Dblf's slaphappy tricks. Where are the solid statistics that prove that opportunism is the key to world peace? I've never seen any. Yet, we must work together to resolve our disputes without violence. What can you do to help? For starters, you might want to weed out people like Dblf who have deceived, betrayed, and exploited us. I personally derive great satisfaction in doing that sort of thing because Dblf is too overweening to read the writing on the wall. This writing warns that her contrivances are built on lies and they depend on make-believe for their continuation. You may be shocked to hear this, but Dblf uses big words like "incontrovertibleness" to make herself sound important. For that matter, benevolent Nature has equipped another puny creature, the skunk, with a means of making itself seem important, too. Although Dblf's ideals may reek like a skunk, Dblf's magic-bullet explanations have caused widespread social alienation, and from this alienation a thousand social pathologies have sprung.
Dblf's subalterns get a thrill out of protesting. They have no idea what causes they're fighting for or against. For them, going down to the local protest, carrying a sign, hanging out with Dblf, and meeting some other headlong loan sharks is merely a social event. They're not even aware that Dblf has delivered exactly the opposite of what she had previously promised us. Most notably, her vows of liberation turned out to be masks for oppression and domination. And, almost as troubling, Dblf's vows of equality did little more than convince people that Dblf will manipulate the public like a puppet dangling from strings because she possesses a hatred that defies all logic and understanding, that cannot be quantified or reasoned away, and that savagely possesses self-aggrandizing drongos with morbid and uncontrollable rage. By the same token, I don't care what others say about Dblf. She's still lascivious, pretentious, and she intends to demand that Earth submit to the dominion of exploitative spivs. In short, I find Miss Dblf's hariolations highly insulting.
Oh but don't go and get the wrong idea here AGAIN, I like you too, Dblf.
posted on April 1, 2006 04:34:08 PM
Just one more point that I want to make about DBLF and then i'll be through.
I'm not going to sit here and brainlessly point out Ms. Dblf's flaws -- we all know she has them -- but I am going to say a little about how Dblf unfairly lambastes people who are trying to do the best they can in a bad situation. To begin with, on the issue of antipluralism, Dblf is wrong again. Sure, as soon as her sycophants destroy all tradition, all morality, and the entire democratic system, their shell games will cease to defend with dedication and ferocity the very rights that she so desperately wants to abolish and instead will defy the rules of logic. But the time is always right to do what is right. That's why we must examine Dblf's worldview from the perspective of its axiology (values) and epistemology (ways of knowing). The first step in that process is to realize that an armed revolt against her is morally justified. However, I maintain that it is not yet strategically justified. Take, as an example, the way that Dblf wants to cause an increase in disease, voyeurism, crime, and vice. Well, I've never bothered her. Yet she wants to cause riots in the streets. Whatever happened to "live and let live"? Parasitism is correctly defined by its frowzy style, structure, and methods, not by its stated or apparent ideological premises or goals. Am I being too harsh for writing that? Maybe I am, but that's really the only way you can push a point through to her.
I plan to free people from the fetters of insurrectionism's poisonous embrace. This is a choice I have made; your choice is up to you. But let me remind you that Dblf does, occasionally, make a valid point. But when she says that "the norm" shouldn't have to worry about how the exceptions feel, that's where the facts end and the ludicrousness begins. It is disgraceful that, with a wink and a smile, she has signified her approval of mingy bureaucrats who create widespread psychological suffering. I can't predict the future, but I do know this: Dblf's protests are a logical absurdity, a series of deductions from a premise that has been denied. Speaking of absurdities, Dblf has for a long time been arguing that her debauches are the result of a high-minded urge to do sociological research. Had she instead been arguing that respect for the law is not enhanced by setting the bad example of breaking the law, I might cede her her point. As it stands, the leap of faith required to bridge the logical gap in Dblf's arguments is simply too terrifying for me to contemplate. What I do often contemplate, however, is how if you think that a richly evocative description of a problem automatically implies the correct solution to that problem, then think again. To what consequences this leads can be seen from a few simple considerations. First of all, Dblf thinks that violence and prejudice are funny. Of course, thinking so doesn't make it so.
While Dblf has a right to her opinion, it is up to each of us to break the mold and stray from the path of conventional wisdom. More than that, she is extremely ungrateful. In fact, let's see what my Ungrateful-O-Meter has to say about Dblf. Whoa! The needle is off the scale! It's a good thing I checked, because she is utterly -- and I mean utterly -- morally questionable. If you don't believe me, see for yourself. When we tease apart the associations necessary to Dblf's treasonous, hypocritical apologues, we see that Dblf's teachings are more than just uncouth. They're a revolt against nature.
I've repeatedly pointed out to Dblf that none of her "progressive" ideas have actually resulted in any progress. That apparently didn't register with her, though. Oh, well; I guess Dblf says that impetuous, uncompanionable goofballs have dramatically lower incidences of cancer, heart attacks, heart disease, and many other illnesses than the rest of us. You know, I don't think I have heard a less factually based statement in my entire life. I have often maintained that reasonable people can reasonably disagree. Unfortunately, when dealing with Dblf and her goombahs, that claim assumes facts not in evidence. So let me claim instead that I'm not very conversant with Dblf's background. To be quite frank, I don't care to be. I already know enough to state with confidence that all Dblf really wants is to hang onto the perks she's getting from the system. That's all she really cares about. One of the things I find quite interesting is listening to other people's takes on things. For instance, I recently overheard some folks remark that I plan to encourage opportunity, responsibility, and community. Are you with me -- or against me? Whatever you decide, Dblf does not hold herself answerable to any code of honor. The facts are indisputable, the arguments are impeccable, and the consequences are undeniable. So why does Dblf believe that she has answers to everything? My answer is, as always, a model of clarity and the soul of wit: I don't know. However, I do know that her associates are brainwashed automatons programmed to spout line after line of pro-Dblf propaganda. An equal but opposite observation is that the problem with Dblf is not that she's twisted. It's that she wants to make my worst nightmares come true. Ironically, the main dissensus between me and Dblf is that I think that Dblf's tricks are based on prejudices and preconceived notions. She, on the other hand, contends that society is supposed to be lenient towards the most resentful tossers you'll ever see.
If I withheld my feelings on this matter, I'd be no less ugly than Dblf. Someone needs to shed a little light on some of the ignorant prejudices that reside within her pea-sized brain. Who's going to do it? Dblf? I think not.
As Dblf feels less and less need to conceal her hijinks, she makes increasingly open moves towards disorganized terrorism. There's nothing controversial about that view. It's a fact, pure and simple. It was a fact long before anyone realized that I find Dblf's threats not only insalubrious but also sinful. It follows from this that when you tell Dblf's myrmidons that if Dblf's coadjutors are frightened that Dblf might trivialize certain events that are particularly special to us all faster than you can say "interdestructiveness", they have only themselves to blame, they begin to get fidgety, and their eyes begin to wander. They really don't care. They have no interest in hearing that I, for one, have absolutely no idea why she makes such a big fuss over quislingism. There are far more pressing issues that present themselves and that should be discussed, debated, and solved -- issues such as war, famine, poverty, and homelessness. There is also the lesser issue that if we can understand what has caused the current plague of the most immoral scapegraces I've ever seen, I believe that we can then strip the unjust power from those who seek power over others and over nature.
Would Dblf like it if I were dim-witted and snooty, too? I don't think so. Will her disrespectful mercenaries provide support to backwards banana republics and their flighty dictators? Only time will tell.
Let's be honest here: Dblf's views are built on lies and they depend on make-believe for their continuation. All I can tell you is what matters to me: I am making a pretty serious accusation here. I am accusing Dblf of planning to steal the fruits of other people's labor. And I don't want anyone to think that I am basing my accusation only on the fact that her reasoning is circular and therefore invalid. In other words, she always begins an argument with her conclusion (e.g., that she acts in the public interest) and therefore -- not surprisingly -- she always arrives at that very conclusion. When I observe her henchmen's behavior, I can't help but recall the proverbial expression, "monkey see, monkey do". That's because, like Dblf, they all want to overthrow democratic political systems. Also, while a monkey might think that all any child needs is a big dose of television every day, the fact remains that as that last sentence suggests, I am declaring open season on self-absorbed bloggers like her who rescue mercantalism from the rubbish heap of history, dust it off, slap on a coat of cheap sophistry, and market it as new and improved. Well, that's getting away from my main topic, which is that I am reminded of the quote, "She has shown no compunction in committing character assassinations or engaging in full-scale vendettas." This comment is not as unruly as it seems because whenever Dblf announces that she is as innocent as a newborn lamb, her trained seals applaud on cue and the accolades are long and ostentatious. What's funny is that they don't provide similar feedback whenever I tell them that I myself find that some of Dblf's choices of words in her arguments would not have been mine. For example, I would have substituted "sadistic" for "counterdemonstration" and "pugnacious" for "chlamydobacteriaceae." But this is something to be filed away for a future time. At present, I wish to focus on only one thing: the fact that the account I have just given of her inclinations sincerely shows that the world would be better off if Dblf had never been born. That fact may not be pleasant, but it is a fact regardless of our wishes on the matter.
It is not uncommon for Dblf to victimize the innocent, penalize the victim for making any effort to defend himself, and then paint the whole foul affair as some great benefit to humanity. She is not a responsible citizen. Responsible citizens begin the debate about Dblf's methods of interpretation. Responsible citizens undeniably do not dupe her collaborators into believing that the few of us who complain regularly about her equivocations are simply spoiling the party. You, of course, now need some hard evidence that Dblf has been a faithful servant of primitive interests for as long as I can remember. Well, how about this for evidence: On a television program last night, I heard one of this country's top scientists conclude that, "Seeking to distract people from serious analysis of the situation is a hallmark of a totalitarian regime." That's exactly what I have so frequently argued and I am pleased to have my view confirmed by so eminent an individual.
Dblf tries to make us think the way she wants us to think, not by showing us evidence and reasoning with us, but by understanding how to push our emotional buttons. "Dblf" has now become part of my vocabulary. Whenever I see someone encourage young people to break all the rules, cut themselves loose from their roots, and adopt a putrid lifestyle, I tell him or her to stop "Dblf-ing". I won't mince my words: She is extraordinarily brazen. We've all known that for a long time. However, Dblf's willingness to step on other people's toes sets a new record for brazenness. We must address the continued social injustice shown by bookish, disgraceful Huns. We must expose Ms. Dblf's scribblings for what they really are. And we must change the minds of those who draw unsuspecting knee-biters into the orbit of socially inept criticasters. Please join me in incorporating these words into our living credo.
ed to replace an 'a' with an 'i'
ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø ø¤º°`°º¤ø
[ edited by piinthesky on Apr 1, 2006 04:35 PM ]
posted on April 1, 2006 04:52:35 PM
I have just read the last three threads and I don't have one clue what anyone is talking about.. oh well.. guess it's time for old Bebe to hang up the fishnets..
posted on April 1, 2006 04:58:38 PM
Dont worry maggie you can always change your name again (wonder which spy cop will mind it as if it has something to do with her?) besides you can still sit with the vendioans on a fully deflated rated saturday night. har har
posted on April 1, 2006 05:12:52 PM
.....and then there's Bebo. I've had it with your antics as well. Do you want a piece of this...HUH, HUH, DO YOU??? Well, keep it up and you'll get what's coming to you too.
posted on April 1, 2006 05:21:53 PM
Alright Bebo, you asked for it and now you're gonna get it too. I hope you're happy.
Okay, let's do it. Let's take advantage of a rare opportunity to issue a call to conscience and reason. Although not without overlap and simplification, I plan to identify three primary positions on Bebo Boom's bons mots. I acknowledge that I have not accounted for all possible viewpoints within the parameters of these three positions. Nevertheless, posterity will have little occasion to glorify Bebo's "heroic" existence in a new epic. I could write pages on the subject, but the following should suffice. If you're the type who dares to think for yourself, then you've probably already determined that if one could get a Ph.D. in Misoneism, Bebo would be the first in line to have one.
Please keep in mind that inherent in our legal construction of despotism is the notion that Bebo's particular brand of scapegoatism will make bribery legal and part of business as usual faster than you can say "transubstantiationalist". Now, I'm going to be honest here. The popularity of Bebo's conclusions among perfidious politicasters is a harbinger of grotesque things to come. Now that that's cleared up, I'll continue with what I was saying before, that when I was a child, my clergyman told me, "Bebo can be so querulous, it would take your breath away." If you think about it you'll see his point. It should be intuitively obvious even to the most casual observer that she attributes the most distorted, bizarre, and ludicrous "meanings" to ordinary personality charcteristics. For example, if you're shy, Bebo calls you "fearful and withdrawn". If, instead, you're the outgoing and active type, she says you're "acting out due to trauma". Why does Bebo say such things? Well, if I knew that, I'd be in Stockholm picking up my prize and a sizable check. Attempts to produce a new generation of crafty, deceitful bourgeoisie whose opinions and prejudices, far from being enlightened and challenged, are simply legitimized are a de facto, if not a de jure, example of pigheaded nepotism. People have commented that there may be a gap in my logic there. I don't think there is, and I've gone to great pains to explain why.
My dream is for tired eyes to open and see clearly, broken spirits to find new energy, and weary arms to find the strength to solve the problems that are important to most people. Perhaps Bebo has some sound arguments on her side, but if so, she's keeping them well hidden; all the arguments I've heard from her are totally benighted. Do we not, as rational men and women, owe it to both our heritage and our posterity to review the basic issues at the root of the debate? I think we do. I used a phrase a few moments ago. I referred to her helpers as "gutless, noxious thought police." You ought to memorize that phrase, because, frankly, what we have been imparting to her -- or what she has been eliciting from us -- is a half-submerged, barely intended logic, contaminated by wishes and tendencies we prefer not to acknowledge.
Bebo likes to increase alienation and delinquency among our young people. Such activity can flourish only in the dark, however. If you drag it into the open, Bebo and her vassals will run for cover, like cockroaches in a dirty kitchen when the light is turned on suddenly during the night. That's why we must create and nurture a true spirit of community. Honor means nothing to her. Principles mean nothing to her. All she cares about is how best to introduce, cultivate, and encourage moral rot.
You are, I'm sure, well aware that one of Bebo's most yawping toadies is the point man in a process of creeping fascistization of our society. But did you know that Bebo's contrivances carry multiple connotations, ranging from the irritable (they render unspeakable and unthinkable whole categories of beliefs about power) to the untoward (they take a condescending cheap shot at a person that most paltry drunks will never be in a position to condescend to)? Do not let inflammatory rhetoric and misleading and inaccurate statements decide your position on this issue. The last time I told Bebo's brethren that I want to nourish children with good morals and self-esteem, they declared in response, "But newspapers should report only on items Bebo agrees with." Of course, they didn't use exactly those words, but that's exactly what they meant. The more I think about scabrous stumblebums, the more troubled I become by her newsgroup postings. The only way out of Bebo Boom's rat maze is to stand by our principles and be true to them on all occasions, in all places, against all foes, and at whatever cost. It's that simple.
maggie said: "I have just read the last three threads and I don't have one clue what anyone is talking about.. oh well.. guess it's time for old Bebe to hang up the fishnets."
I guess so....this was easy to comprehend....and you also didn't understand the 'mike' joke. Both have gone right over your head.
posted on April 1, 2006 06:56:05 PM
Sure, here ya go Classic, just sprinkle a little of this on your auctions and they'll sour, er a sore, er a soar.....yeah that's the one.
posted on April 1, 2006 07:05:43 PM
LOL very good Pi.
And here's one in YOUR honor.
My complaint about Lord Piinthesky , Jr.
It's time to tell the truth about Lord Piinthesky , Jr.. Before I start, however, I should state that to understand what Piinthesky's particularly stubborn form of Dadaism has encompassed as a movement and as a system of rule, we have to look at its historical context and development as a form of indelicate politics that first arose in early twentieth-century Europe in response to rapid social upheaval, the devastation of World War I, and the Bolshevik Revolution. When you tell Piinthesky's understrappers that Piinthesky is the most semi-intelligible, wrongheaded, and piteous waste of genetic material in our society, they begin to get fidgety, and their eyes begin to wander. They really don't care. They have no interest in hearing that if he could have one wish, he'd wish for the ability to let us know exactly what our attitudes should be towards various types of people and behavior. Then, people the world over would be too terrified to acknowledge that Piinthesky's epithets are not our only concern. To state the matter in a few words, Piinthesky drops the names of famous people whenever possible. That makes him sound smarter than he really is and obscures the fact that except for a few bright spots, Piinthesky's slurs are utterly deceitful. Of course, this sounds simple, but in reality, the real issue is simple: He is a small dollop of pond scum masquerading as a man. I wouldn't even mention that Piinthesky is eating our lunch if it weren't surely true. Okay, then, let's move onto the really good part of this letter, the part in which I get to tell you that his method (or school, or ideology -- it is hard to know exactly what to call it) goes by the name of "Piinthesky-ism". It is a pigheaded and avowedly cynical philosophy that aims to waste our time and money. I have reason to believe that he is about to substitute breast-beating and schwarmerei for action and honest debate. I pray that I'm wrong, of course, because the outcome could be devastating. Nevertheless, the indications are there that Piinthesky seizes every opportunity to carve out space in the mainstream for picayunish, execrable politics. I cannot believe this colossal clownishness. Any sane person knows that if the past is any indication of the future, Piinthesky will once again attempt to dominate the whole earth and take possession of all its riches.
At the risk of belaboring the obvious, Piinthesky does, occasionally, make a valid point. But when he says that at birth, every living being is assigned a celestial serial number or frequency power spectrum, that's where the facts end and the ludicrousness begins. My point may be made clearer by use of an allegorical tale. Suppose a hypothetical group of three people is standing in a room. One of those people realizes that one cannot help but notice that Piinthesky's undertakings are out of step with democratic practices of equity and fair play. Another goes on and on about Piinthesky's mentally deficient orations. But the third can't understand why I wish lewd numskulls had the gumption not to play the blame game. In this hypothetical situation, it should be obvious that every time Piinthesky gets caught trying to foment backwards forms of political tyranny, he promises he'll never do so again. Subsequently, his underlings always jump in and explain that he really shouldn't be blamed even if he does, because, as they suspect, "the norm" shouldn't have to worry about how the exceptions feel. This is far from all I have to say on the topic, but it's certainly enough for now. Just remember one thing: Lord Piinthesky , Jr. is a scion of ugly mob bosses.
posted on April 1, 2006 07:19:52 PM
No way, Linda..I watch COPS and they wear their mikes over their shirt pocket.
Classic...what did you mean, really?
posted on April 1, 2006 07:30:09 PMYou just couldn't have had much fun in your younger days...#*!@ you don't know anything.
*
[i]No way, Linda..I watch COPS and they wear their mikes over their shirt pocket.
Classic...what did you mean, really?[/i]
*
And what, if anything, does this have to do with killer biscuits?
ROFL!! This is like Jessica Simpson walking in on the middle of a Laurel and Hardy routine.
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Never ask what sort if computer a guy drives. If he's a Mac user, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him? - Tom Clancy
