posted on March 10, 2001 11:24:39 AM new
Since I was "born into" the Lutheran Church, and my sister-in-law is a Lutheran minister, I found this hilarious and lighthearted. Hope you other Lutherans like it.
SINGING WITH THE LUTHERANS By Garrison Keillor
I have made fun of Lutherans for years--who wouldn't if you lived in Minnesota? But I have also sung with Lutherans and that is one of the main joys of life, along with hot baths and fresh sweet corn.
We make fun of Lutherans for their blandness, their excessive calm, their fear of giving offense, their constant guilt that burns like a pilot light, their lack of speed and also for their secret fondness for
macaroni and cheese. But nobody sings like them.
If you ask an audience in New York City, a relatively "Lutheranless" place, to sing along on the chorus of "Michael Row the Boat Ashore" they will look daggers at you as if you had asked them to strip to their underwear.
But if you do this among Lutherans they'll smile and row that boat ashore and up on the beach and down the road! Lutherans are bred from childhood to sing in four-part harmony. It's a talent that comes from sitting on the lap of someone singing alto or tenor or bass and hearing the harmonic intervals by putting your little head against that person's rib cage.
It's natural for Lutherans to sing in harmony. We're too modest to be soloists, too worldly to sing in unison. When you're singing in the key of C and you slide into the A7th and D7th chords, all two hundred
of you, it's an emotionally fulfilling moment.
I once sang the bass line of "Children of the Heavenly Father" in a room with about three thousand Lutherans in it; and when we finished we all had tears in our eyes, partly from the promise that God will not
forsake us, partly from the proximity of all those lovely voices. By our joining in harmony, we somehow promise that we will not forsake each other. I do believe this: people, these Lutherans, who love to sing in four-part harmony are the sort of people
you could call up when you're in deep distress. If you're dying, they'll comfort you. If you're lonely, they'll talk to you. And if you're hungry, they'll give you tuna salad!
posted on March 10, 2001 11:37:45 AM new
Muriel, you are good people and so are the
Lutherans, thanks for sharing....really nice.
Uuuuhhh, wonder if they could make that tuna
casserole, I mean I might be really hungry!
[ edited by zilvy on Mar 10, 2001 11:39 AM ]
posted on March 10, 2001 11:41:10 AM newZilvy - I was thinking the same thing because, as Lutherans, we always brought "tuna hot dish" to the potlucks after church!
posted on March 10, 2001 01:58:57 PM new
And here I thought this was going to be a mafia-themed thread. The title sounds like a mafia threat, a la "sleeping with the fishes."
"Tell us what we wanna know, or you'll be singin' with the Lutherans."
